to add to my roll of posting alot... i like the word latitude mixed with attitude... im gonna make some slogan or quote and make moola of money.,... its gonna be a catchy quote... a memorable one...
like how i like to quote Ocean's Eleven's "Are You In Or Out?" thing... yeah...

still love joanne... damn... shes still looking at me...

oh, if you didnt notice... i switched out the chinese songs with this opening theme from zoids... Wild Flowers... i like to sing it =)... ill switch an ayumi song in soon.

Ok, Im very very infatuated with Joanne Lee... thats the full name of the girl singer... finally i found out.. b4 i just remembered joanne. but now i know its joanne lee... woohoo..

So this is what the girl looks like... u know why im this into her... cuz ironically she reminds me strongly, and i mean stronnngly, of crystal (I think we went through that story before) But still... isn't she just too kute for a korean girl who was raised in cali and can speak korean and english fluently... i think thats why i keep thinking shes crystal... cuz of the english... but of course heres the bad thing... Joanne is born 1988, which makes her eight years lesser...around 14-15... DAMN... wait... since ive seen nothing but women as much as 8 years older than me during the summer, whats wrong with going the other direction? ... hmm....

Damn, I just can't stop staring at her eyes... One of those traits in a woman i look for that wasnt of a purely superficial nature would be eyes... i guess thats why ayumi sucked me in... and now joanne... and also since she really really realllreallyreallyreallyreally looks like crystal... so that also means she bears slight resemblennce to jessie too... but less jess..

If you would like some idea, here's a US fansite for Joanne. if only it werent a crime =) *sigh*

In a day when I'm being really curt to my peopppple, its nice to enjoy something good. so i miraculously had a dream... it was a good dream, cuz jenny was in it... no not that you sick bastard... it was a wholesome dream because the woman was actually nice and talking to me, nothing like reality... reality sux. phantasy rules... (oh yeah, phantasy star online is a killer game... in tw)so that dream lasted all early afternoon as i ignored all my phone calls and watch transformers.

I mentioned i love annie and lizhe, but that doesn't mean i have to help them or answer their calls... so if i want to shut them down a day im allowed to.

What the hell was that gurls name from the volleyball the night before... hmm.. cant remember... right now im watching my lectures... about 8-9 hours left... give or take i have to watch the lectures i slept through while i was lying on my bed... anyways... the teacher is dressed like mickey mouse from Fantasia... i hope i dont fail from a class that has a screwed up teacher... i have to get my lsat done soon... geez, everyone seems to be getting started or taking preparations for GRE, GMATS, MCATS, and LSATS, and im not on the ball... im fucked...

Called angela, no answer... damn... when i really need to talk to someone, even though i dont know what i would expect from this call... maybe a quick blow off...

Dammit... afterlooking at vans future computer setup, im pondering to build a new system... i really like th new sony RX vaoi one from overseas... but then i want super performance for cheap... hmm...

~did I mention I love cheerleaders~

what are friends? friends are people that give me latitude and not attitude... friends are people that call me more than i call them. friends are people that shoot the breeze... friends stick together, and do not dessert. friends come out to dinners, birthdays, etc. friends give me money (sometimes) ... friends mail my GODDAMN BUNNY BACK TO STATES OR AT LEAST TO MY MOM SO I CAN GET MY BUNNY BACK!!(BASTAAD) ... friends dont use weaknesses as low low blows. friends dont lecture me on how to handle my other friends.... friends should not be evil... friends give me their car! (I hope)... thats pretty much all... so to quote daniel ocean, "Are you in or out?"

I just need ten, unless you think i need one more..... you think i need one more. Fine ill get one more.

I am tired.... another bad or so day....
I woke up at van's place because the person that drove me there the night before got piss drunk and couldnt drive me back hom.e so i got home around the time i would wake up, showered, and went to chinese class... sat infront next to the zhang ziyi clone chick. got out of class. jenny's roomate told me jenny may be purposely avoiding me or the subject of me, even dancing around the quiestions that liz asked her... ok if jenny has to avoid the subject even to liz, it gets bad... ok, now im obseeing over the long period of not directly talking... b3ecause shes left me no choice... fick...

Went with lizhe to get her contacts and the infirmary, since she was sick and moody and no one else was going to go with her... and its never fun to go to those places alone.... while i was bored at the infirmary, i got bored and busted out my R/C car, the little one, and i got ppl lining up asking what it was and where they can get it.... Well, its called the Tomy Bit CHAR-G (Not to be the same as merging Bit and Char-G together, like how its spelled on the car, and turning the name into the "Bitch Car-G")... here is results from ebay, where the price seems to start around 15 dollars... almost half what I paid for it... ANYWAYS, back to the stroy... everyone love japanese stuff that i have. Anyways during the process of w/ liz i agreed to make another inane greeting msg to tell ppl not to leave a msg on her voicemail (defeats the point of voicemail)... and somehow troi got all really down that the thing was directed at them, and anne was trying to lecture me and delivered a low blow... grr... lets not discuss that... lets just say you dont use my weakness against me in a conversation if you dont want me to bring out the big guns that will fuck you over seriously... ive kept my restraint but i can't for so long... besides i know annie wants to help but her, like all the other bad-advice women, are just that, bad advice to other girls, screwing over guiys like me and phong and all the others that just want some point to life....

Haircut; got to workout today... well, actually first went to some volleyball thing of a friend of phons, apparently a girl of phongs from back in the day... maybe i have been feeling out of it since tw, or my standards are low, but she was more or less cute with a spireted nature.... and she WAS a cheerleader (ahh, the memories).... eah, i guewss she was cute... i guess... anyways, afterwards went to Gator Nights (FYI: Gator nights are a University of Florida Weekly froday night thing where you have neon bowling and powl and it has events like movies and sand art and stuff... anyways... i bowled a good score... at least it broke 100, thats all im gonna say... I dont like friends that ditfh friends (me) that is one thing i dont stand for...if you move as one group you stay as one group or tell everyone the plan... so the anne and liz and phong leaving me at the gameroom for 15 mintes alone was "not right at all" (thats what rich said to me b4)... so that means even i love anny, im not fucking help her with her computer... after this afternoon and tonite...

Gotta start studying really this weekend, god shoot me.. oh, i blame eric kim for getting me hooked on S.H.E's Gei wo duo yi dian.

So i find some happiness when im around annie and liz, thats nothing bad... its a hell of alot better than being around alot of other people... it seems with every other person i am near, w/ the exception of phong and van, i have issues with the others... angela, kim (maybe), troi, tevin (maybe too), jenny, to name the few i do call out as problems... there are a bunch of others, but that would encompass the whole webpage... anyways.. i've seen basically liz and anne everyday... most of the time its not even on purpose too, but i see one of them and then we all out the other one, its bad... i think we should be shot... i havent gotten any studying done becauxe of them too, they are a badd influence... i hope they suffer horribly muahhahahaa...

Another set of translated anime lyrics: This time its from the opening theme of the original season of Digimon in Japan: Title Butterfly Gee I wonder why...
Id suggest you download the song to enjoy the translation... its got a rock type melody in it. I dunnno, I just like singing this one...

I'll become a happy butterfly, and ride on the glittering wind
I'll come to see you soon
It's best to forget the unnecessary things
There's no more time to be fooling around

What do you mean, wow wow wow wow wow? I wonder if we'll reach the skies
But, wow wow wow wow wow I don't even know what my plans are for tomorrow

After an endless dream, in this world of nothingness
It seems as if our beloved dreams will lose
Even with these unreliable wings, covered in images that tend to stay
I'm sure we can fly, on my love

I'll become a merry butterfly, and ride on the earnest wind
I'll come to see you where ever you are
Ambiguous words are surprisingly handy
I'll shout it out, while listening to a hit song

What do you mean, wow wow wow wow wow? I wonder if it'll echo through this town
But, wow wow wow wow wow There's no use anticipating

After an endless dream, in this miserable world
That's right, maybe not using common sense isn't so bad after all
Even with these awkward wings, dyed with images that seem to stay
I'm sure we can fly, on my love

After an endless dream, in this world of nothingness
It seems as if our beloved dreams will lose
Even with these unreliable wings, covered in images that tend to stay
I'm sure we can fly, oh yeah

After an endless dream, in this miserable world
That's right, maybe not using common sense isn't so bad after all
Even with these awkward wings, dyed with images that seem to stay
I'm sure we can fly, on my love

Also, I highly recommend d/ling Ayumi's "Evolution" song, you won't be dissapointed... unless you like that k-rap stuff.

I checked the site meter (709 babie!!) and ive come to some weird referrals...
heres one:
From Google: ... i dont wear a shirt to bed ... in thousands of them , all half naked ... they are not that nice of women ... and if not for someomes semi -britney ... c Crys is a whole not...: Thats what the people read as the teaser///
Another Google: ... this time im putting it under the subprofile ... DRUNK, and you get big trouble for 4 ... want tobe with her in california and stuff ... why da hell would you cheat on ur ...
I dont know how ppeopl got to my page from here... I mean, the referal site is freakin in chinese, and the only word that got them here is rape.... err. you have to check it out...
YAY Im the second of 3 hits from this google search string Its like there are ppl that spell as bad as me... hmm

I wonder if Vivian will see this one of these days... HEY SIS, HOW THE KID?!?!? COME VISIT UR BROTHER IN COLLEGE, MY FRIENDS WANT TO DROOL AT YOU!!! heheh, that should work.

Oh yeah, Ive concluded my business law teacher is insane and bald... eek.

I dont know whats wrong with me. I feel soo tired lately, my arms are still sore still from the workout on sunday... I have been fatigued... I feel asleep at 330 and missed class, and didnt wake up till 8 or so. I dont know... maybe its because Ive been eatin too much or not eating enough.... or it could be the too much thinking and processing of things... and there is alot of thing, so lets break it down...

I have 6 days to watch 13 hours of classes for the test. and I was talking with Anne, who is going to law school, and she has a better bead on law for the next year than I have... I have no idea if I can pull off getting into law school from here. It totally sucks. I gotta get cracking on my lsats and also balance the classes out soon... i have marketing test soon after this test... erp...

I have women on the brain too, so that eats up my mind.. One has to do with Angy... its because I dunno, that was one person I still miss who who makes anyperson she knows feel comfortable... and now i can never get that comfort again... and i guess its a little empty.. i mean at least i still will see her... but i think our distance is pretty far apart now... i dont know... sooo confusing to me... must be some miami thing.

The other woman social thing is wit jen. I dont know what the fuck is going on, but I can really swear she does not want to talk with me... I swear... she left a guest entry in the profile but that is probably the longest sentesce she has ever wrote to me,, and thats because I wasnt part of a conversation (guestbooks are one-sided)(... Whenever I imed her the other times, she doesnt respond even though its apparent shes right there in fron t of the damn computer... I dispatched lizhe out to find out, but i didnt get any relevant answer... so now i am borderline sad/mad/annoyed... realisticaly, she hasnt said more than 10 words to me in the last week... that ratio is really sucky... WTF IS GOING ON???!!

Oh i had a small realization... i like it when women wear my clothes... one is because it looks good on them, and two is because its my wardrobe... heehee.. I think the first tiem I lent someone an article of clothing was crystal, when she didnt have a shirt to practice cheerleading in and almost ripped my shirt off (after the begging)... so she wore that, and afterwards infused the shirt with lotion from her bag to get rid of any sweat or smell she put onto it... though I wouldnt mind at all if she did work up perspiration or not... i was still on the high from watching her do her routines in my shirt (very babetastic, ohhh yeah)... though i must make the quirk that I always want the clothes back... because my wardrobe is very limited and i can consider the clothes returned to me as little memories.

I pulled this from bobbo... what do you think... i know your thinking about it right now... is it really true or bs? or u wanna explaine the scientific standpoint.
"Sex does not loosen a girl's vagina. God, what a stupid myth. That's like saying shitting loosens your ass." ~BChang

Also, if Van reads this: you seriously need to consider writing a journal... you have way too many stories that ware wayy too funny, and it would be good to share and let the whole world not wat to do... or just make everyone laugh....er on second thought... you could get ur nose kicked in if you did that... think about it...

You know how in movies scenes, there is a certain part when two enemies or adversaries see each other and somehow time slows down to a crawl or slows to nothing so in an infinite amont of time you look hard at each other, feeling the others cold hard gaze trying to pierce your mind's eye for your inner thoughts.... and then time resumes and you resume life... well i dont remember what movie that had that, but i know ive seen it before... its either that type, or the two people see each other, and then a camera does a fast pan around each person as wind gives each person a surrealistic look. i'm sorry, i watch too much tv, so live to me has a directors cut in everyting

So why am I talking about that???/ Well, I think I had that first directors cut today, after chinese class... walking with munye and mike talking and stff, and i see troi on the other side of the street... and he sees me. and basiaclly I felt like time slowed down to about 50%, as we kept walking and looking at each other for that 2-4 seconds of eternity. Now its still hard to try and delve the facial features oftroi, cuz i really dont remember what his hapy mad sad and indifferent facial expressions are... i usually think they are about all the same... so yes i couldnt tell what he was thinking. I doubthe could versa that, cuz i was talking to munye while i was talking to him... so its more like hes not too signifigant enough for me to break my conversation... it it was more of a bigger issue, i wouldve paused, but I only do that at women, and troi aint a girll. That was the cut of the day.

Other insignifigants:Prez of HEAL wanted my License so he could pass for legal, but hes viet and im not by the opinion of the other viets in the office... how crushing since old grannys and other people used to thingk I was....

Went to shopping with annie and lizhe (liz's second nickname that I madeup today: Lizche- pronounced Lee-Zhi-, the chinese for lychee, but i would say it with a "z" instead of "ch")) to go shopping... its more or less conforting with them cuz this way i can maintain my mandarin and they almost act like little school girls half the time, they whine alot =P. anyways, went to walmart, and forgot my bigger rug... wahh... then went to a Texas Roadhouse, where everyone ate too much and almost didnt make it to the restrooms on the walk over to target cuz we were laughing too much... that was a little too hilarious... aftwaards publix (sigh, melissa isnt working today... i heard shes only weekly), then home and passed out, and woke up drooling on my pillow and getting a headache and sore muscles... i think i really should go workout tomororw (wedsday) so i can keep the pain going, and this natural tiredness.... oh, i might not go to tubing, cuz its boring...i dont think annie should drag liz to it... cuz BOTH OF THEM CANT SWIM....

So this is what i looked like as a kid.... ahhh how naive i was/am... I think this is my 2nd-3rd birthday

Finally I found some translations:
Catch You, Catch Me

I want to see you, but I can't... How sad, these feelings...
I can't say it, but I want to.
I just keep letting my chance slip by.

But still (But still) But still (But still)
Together, let's spread our wings and
marathon across the sky; I want our dreams to be in unison

Hey look!
Catch You Catch You Catch Me Catch Me Wait up!
Look this way and say you like me.
Yeah! Nice to Meet You Good to See You Surely!
My thoughts will
fly, fly, fly into your heart!
They - won't - get - lost - here!

Sometimes, my batteries just run dry.
But with your smile,
they're always fully charged, ready to explode.

Please (Please) Please (Please)
We're friends first, so
I want to smile, look at you, and have fun every day.

Hey look!
Catch You Catch You Catch Me Catch Me Absolutely!
It's our destiny. It suits us well.
Yeah! Nice to Meet You Good to See You Surely!
I won't give in to anyone. I'll be
No. 1, No. 1, No. 1, No. 1 in the world to you!
I'm - in - love - with - you!

from Cardcaptor Sakura

Lizz got her hair fixed, its alot more better than the crap last time. I got to work out. I think I can do my old weights but it takes awhile cuz i am soo tired... I keep having pain in the head...lIKE iM TIRED.... SOOO TIRED....

i THINK i PISSED OFF kIM, THE PRESIDENT OF cASA. oops. caps lock. Yeah but I bet shes stressed and on her cycle.... I am realizing there are alot more stories around this hell hole of campus than I once thought... Everyone has some story with any other person.... Great... just great... Thank god I am a naive little kid. my neighborhood was not a gangzone or anything, it was nice subdivision... and the apt overseas, a nice quaint lane next to a road next to the bus depot, only 15 minutes away from school.... i never had problems with any people of the criminal intent.

Havent started on my law research yet. oops.... And the study session bomebed, and i forgot my headfones. good thing I ran into kitty. She gave me a ride.... i think we stil can get back to how it was when i first me her b4... who knows....

i had other thoughts but i cant think of it... i wish i had my tape recorder...

Complicated: Oh my god its been so long... seems so long... seems like a long time ago... was it a dream, an old memory, or an illusion? Meeting you under such excruiciating circumstances. Not getting any of the signals... so obvious they were... right in front of me,. I was blinded by fun. I let my first impressions detract me from what was being sent my way. I never realized it, until you called for me, and needed support. I still didn't get sucked in. I was too thickheaded. I was struggling with a new place and new responsibilities, and adaptation... I never anticipated much. I was expecting no life, and I ended up with one, one where you were along for the ride. And nothing was wrong, because I was too carefree for it... And it was all just fun... wasn't it?

I never said anything that hinted then what I would feel now.... I was sorting emotions and signals and it was all too quick, everything was buffeting me, I don't know how it happened... I threw you off with thoughts of others, I crushed you... I didn't realize it, that it mighted hurt you. because Im a guy and Im an ass... but the others were slights of fancy and you were always near as support, poking in and seeing whats up. maybe i thought you were just that way... there were others back home like that too... maybe you were just like that? Ive always helped you or tried to help you because on top I thought I was being helpfl, not knowing underneath I was getting a feeling that made me uneasy. But I just hid that from you... If you got too near I would do a cover-up because if I was getting confused I didnt want to manifest out... so instead you see me turn away when you came near.

Our paths would never have cross and walked together because of too many problems... we are so different. we sleep different cycles we have different priorities... We had a commonality that would never let us be. there were others. I cant think of them. You were told things about me that weren't true. My letter, the letter to clear my name, pushed you away. There are so many things... and because of those, i lost the side of you that liked me... How ironic that just b4 that time, I noticed you. And then it went to hell.

Summarized, life was just trying to find you again, but it was hard, and it hurt me. Someone who kept giving me so many knocks of the head stopped knocking. I went down, I spiraled, tail spinning, crashed and burned, and burned, and burned until there was nothing but a sad shell. A shell that found sanctuary with a confidant that would replace how you were my confidant. Only one person really knew my pains of being around you, because there was no one else to trust; everyone else would filter it around and it would become common knowlege and i would be marked. Ironic again, that it would be me to blow my confidante's confidance out to you when i thought you didn't listen...So now you knew my heart's thoughts. But it didn't matter because a new ball was set in motion. The times afterward were never same, and would never be the same. I would slowly move your heart, but it would never be fully back to the first time, if ever. again. there were impulse times, but they were only small blips on the timelin, and never seemed to be signifigant to you.... and then you kept moving, while I followed, but fell behind, and never caught up. you never looked back. Its shown when you forgot my birthday, and put no feeling in your voice when you did remember, and that was the most trying for me.

Now I want a means to the end. I thought an eternity would not be enough to keep you away. I though I had it planned: if I'd see you, Id turn around/ go around you/ ignore you. You call, I would ignore you. I would do everything I could to stay away from you because that is how I would handle it, because thats the only way I know how to handle it, because I can't think another way. It would work too anyways. I wouldnt ask you about life where you were going, what you were doing. We dont have the same classes, we dont even go to the same campus.. we would be seperate. And life would be good. Because thats how I pictured it for the interim. How I took life as during the interim. And thats how I would apply it now, after the interim. We would never have to see each other again. It seemed soo easy, why isnt it so simple.

Why isn't it ever simple. Not even once. I run into you on the road. I run into you in the room. I run into you in the public. And all those things I say about turning around and going the other way went right out the window with my mind, because my heart took over. so instead of blowing you off, I walked over, and yes I said hi. And I would never realize why I would do that. Well maybe because my heart doesn't give up like my mind does. My heart doesn't turn, it doesn't ever stop its love as long as the heart was broken purposely... so my heart would take over, and I would not be able to control it. I wanted to stop, I was tired of playing the game.. I wanted to quit. but the heart fights feircely, and won, so I kept waling toward you, and I said "hi" and we talked... all the 20 seconds... and you said goodbye and walked away, without leaving me anything. Because you did put me back down with the hoard. because we have nothing fun to talk about, because its not the same. The last time I had any fun with you was pushing you arond in a cart., spending time getting food and supplies. It wasn't that long ago either. bt that wasn't normal, that was just a random convergence of feelings........ My heart can't forget you, it can only replace you... when there is someone else, but from the way it looks, there won't be a someone else until im gone, or your gone. I can never wish for yesteryear, because if the dreams come true, i would be happy, complete, or at least satisfied. If I only knew what I know now about then, i wouldnt have ran away. Times, they change. But unfortunately, my heart is a fucking stubborn puppy (like the one you gave me) that can't understandwhen the master says "NO", Only if the puppy was hurt or punished would it ever learn, but nothin like that will happen... because the mind and heart will never agree...

You still have my shirt... from last time you came over... you needed it to get hom, after that time you spent a whole day at my house. I let you wear it because you looked good in my shirt, and i didn't want to dissappoint you... and you took my shirt. you took one of the shirts that defines me, that was given to me by Ray because I wanted his New Jersey shit, and the blue shirt was my favorite to make me look like me... and I let you wear my favorite shirt from my limited wardrobe, and after that day you never came back. As I look back now, you have a part of me that goes with that shirt, and I have nothing of yours. I don't think I can ever get my shirt back. I have no more signature clothes.. I live in a suitcase.

You have my shirt.If im never ever, going to ever see you again in a state other than the one we're in now, I would want my shirt back Because its sitting in your closet and you won't wear it again and that way I have no reason after getting it back to go find you if we stay distant, and because .. i don't know; If youd want to wear it again, well that i would have to consider (and maybe out of insanity i would agree again), but i'd just likeit back because you know that shirt is a trademark of me, like how you said you were me when you were eaaring it... and you know i love that shirt because there is no other one south of the mason dixon that I can find. So if that thing is going to sit in that closet, just do me this one last thing so i wont be pained by you when I see you.I want this to close in the end. I want a means to the end. Return my shirt or my puried heart. call. *aiyah, hao xing ku, wo yao si* -Culumon.


"If love was simple, I would've won you a million times over." ~some tv show (its not really a great show)

Sat: went to mall, watched liz butcher her hair, ran into angela, audrey and mimi; bought black people thug clothes, became black (FUCK YOU MOTHERFUCKING COCKSUCKING COCK =P). got home ran, ran back, participated in evil schemes, went to fsa party, saw more new faces i never seen, didnt get a beer ran home. watched a movie, wrote a short story. Went to sleep... and then it became sunday afternoon...Sometimes I feel sorry for phong, knowing all llll these girls... and all of them taken... and then i look back and i realize, those are most all the girls i know too... damn.... anyways... sleep... i have to think of a new longwinded story.

Note: Munye Chen is bad because she stole 1.1lbs of Ground beef from me and now I cant make Beef Stroganoff. She is meaaan... everyone spam her.

friday: Got to chinese class. teacher gives me look and tells me to see her about my test... and she didnt give it back to me, so im wondering where it went, and when i got to my seat and opened my bag (I didnt touch the bag since class yesterday) I found my test in there... OH SHIT So appeerantly i took it with me... My jaw dropped for a few minutes while class went on... but it was all good... if i had to take it again, i would blow through it... went with munye back to the apt y cuz mike was gonna take her to publix and pepsmart... got grocieries and food... and another sign that either jenny isnt talking with me or hates me or just doesnt want to be friendly with me... i find this frustrating because i regardless find likability in her and I want to chill, but it wont be possible if shes gonna be like that to me.

Got dragged to the mall, becauese some people wanted an image change.... i got to play DDRMAX2: 7th Mix, and man did I get fucked. Well, all the salons were closed... annyways went to hiphop collective and did some pretty crappy moves... Angela called me and wished me a very very belated biithday... so technically shes off my people i hate list, but it still is two days old.... the nerve, how can fat people brreak dance and me flunk at it. anyways... Roger called me and wants to see if i can ask that alexis girl if he could call her.... ooooh does roger have a crush????// hooking up my taiwan peeple in the name of luv... man, i could enjoy this. went to play at gatornights.... phong kicked everyones ass at that, but he sure suxs at bowling; i otoh did a 170... not bad... then dennys... make that perkins, and went home.... that was friday.... mre or less.....


Note: Yea , liz noticed how jenny blew me off. Now Im certain I did something really wrong... I need to send some liasons out to help me, this is getting disturbing.

So anyways, what happened since the last two days..... Ok I'll level with you... I had half the recap done then I hit Esc so I lost it... MOTHER FUCKER!!!! so instead of making a long long entry that it originally was, I'll compress it into fragments youll have to guess... Here we go....

Wed3am....roomatetreatsmokeout... ignoreanniecalls...passout...wakup9am...wentchineseclass...annieambushedme...implorehelpliz....blewthemoff...tootired...sleptinclass... noon-3pm:paper...3-5study...suancamealong...suannice...suanodd...5-:upstairsstudylibrarytopfloor...cutebrunetechatted... sootired... Studying like I was slowly trudging through a field of slow with frostbite...8pm: entered test battle...945: emerge brokent, battered, but alive....

So thats from where I left off.... If you didnt understand... SOL... So anyways, I got home and almost didnt call liz cuz she wanted me to call right after i got out.... I didnt help annie help liz earlier is because I know annie blows helping out of proportions... and the liz issue is of no concern to me because of my state of mind and all the workload I have to take... but anyways, called liz, who dragged me out to dinner with the few friends that came... (The good people who were truly nice and came: liz phong, andy, van, Ann, Al) (the following are forever asses that wouldve came if liz called or they just didnt want to: Angie, Jenny, Tev, May/Pete, Shin and Rick, Anni, Lisa (Im really tired, I didnt mind who would come) and others i can't remember) I was just along for the ride, I really couldnt think straight... I mean, it was just another normal boring typical day... nothing or noone special would come out from it... but anyways, Im not going to let all this quick planning Yu arranged go to waste... not like I can help it... I was sooo tired... Anyways... Went to bentos, where they slammed the door closed on use 30 minutes beforethe advertised closing (Note: if jennyDID come, Im sure we wouldve gotten something, but since as of recently jenny is either super busy or super sktechy, we got jack schit). So we went to Ale house and the majority of guys each ate down 20oz.=. of porterhouse... Overall, it was a nice dinner. I probably wouldv'e expected Yu to plan something like this, but then again; me; tired; sleepy; dead; so I still enjoyed it well, and the steak charged me up for a few more hours.

Got home, stayed up did chinese hw a little, passed out, wokeup to Jenny's roomate munye waking me up for chinese class... took chinese test..... god that wayyyy too easy... got home. IM filled with msgs... Nick, dot, rich, Tim, Chili, my Tas Debbie, .... alot of people with one-line blesses. Even troi wished me a happy... belated... birthday... but i believe he was doing it out of some common courtesy or minute respect for my existence. So in essence, troi one-upped alot of others.... (surprise).... Stayed until Van came and took me around to buy shit and stuff... talked about guy stuff and gossip... stuff like how women can be so devoid of any rational or morals... god, that was a long and interesting chat... Went to the ice cream social and the football game... met a girl that was on loveboat camp 4.... Now I have to talk to ruth or winnie about what camps THEY went to... Oh, I think Roger has in an interest in the friend of the girl i was talking to about loveboat.... ... well see...

So thats how the two days of my birthday went... sorta.... its been while, so i can't remember anything....i just know alot of people are negligent asses i cant stand for anymore....

As of 11:18am EST, I will be 11,570,400 min from my conception.... or 192,840 hrs, or 8,035 days, 1,144 Weeks, or 264 Months, or 22 years from my conception, aka, ya, im friggin twenty-two. It's painful that alas I am 22, in my senior year, with no car, and no copain, and n'ai pas amorè. Not even an idea of where my interest is anymore, or at least uncertain.

Its yet painful that, on my birthday, when I should be out at least getting a round of alcohol served to me by maybe Kungfu12 or something else, or even some presents or gifts from certain peoples, or even a damn cake, I have to spend the evening crunching my brain for a Business Statistics Test, which afterwards I have to start on my Business Law lectures. But I guess I never expect much do I.

My birthday is way too early in the year for too many new people to realize, and the old people have to worry about other things than a birthday in September... The earlier the birthday in the school year, the less likely you can get stuff from ppl... no... the best time to have it is probably in april, maybe around the spring break area, where you can really celebrate.

When's the last time I got someone a birthday gift... I guess maybe recently, or at least a card if not a gift... (I still have Rocky's old gift I have to give him)... But I can honestly say I don't remember getting anything from anyone... Maybe my mind is drawn blank, maybe not. Sofar monetary have been received me by my relatives and family members, but anyone outside that sphere is pretty much shiddy.

So on this somber day, I like to have a wish and a resolution. I can't say the wish as per tradition, but I think you could take 22 guesses and maybe have an idea; my rez... I want to catchup with my studies... I want to resolve/confront current social affairs. I want to get my new car. I want 5k extra money that I can freely waste. I want security.... I want honesty. I don't want to be tricked/played/harassed/shunned/miscontrued/Vexed/Damned/Etc. I just want from friggin compassion and latitude for the past 8034 days I have put up with and sacrificed for all others until today..

If you would like to make me feel better, please send something nice to:
Jonathan Chiang Attn: blUEStREAk
41010302 Keys Complex
Gainesville, FL 32612-4101

I wanted to end this entry with a song or a poem... but I can't because my brain is too tired from the actual intense studies I've undertaken on day 8034. So instead of spinning off lyrics, I'd like you to find and listen to these songs that reflect my today until the weekend: Stay together for the Kids, Adam's Song, Dammit (Blink182), Evolution (Ayumi), In Too Deep (Sum41), Can You Celebrate & Get My Shining (Namie), Hottie (Ashley Ballard), Gone (NSync), A Life of a Person (Fann Wong), In The End (Linkin's Reanimation), My Sacrifice (CreeD)

I may have another entry by Thursday midnight to reflect on the short day, but then again I am tired and blind.... so tired...

ps... I didnt sleep because I have a paper due at 1605hrs, and I have more studying to do... I am really that tired

AHHH Hikaru Utada Got MARRIED!!!! , SHES ONLY 19!!!! AHHH SHE MARRIED A 34 YEAR OLD!!! AHHH SHEE GOES TO COLUMBIA!!! AHH I DONT LIVE IN NEW YORK!!! AHHH WHAT ELSE CAN GO WRONG!!! I HAVE TO WRITE A FAN MAIL TO HER!!!!! I HAVE TO BREAK THEM UP!!! ITS LIKE JESSICA ALBA ALL OVER AGAIN!!! AGGGGGHHHH!!!!

In other singer related news, I have developed an infatuation to 4 in Love (tw pride). Well, not all of them. Just Rainie. Shes way cute. She can sing like Namie Amuro, and shes got big eyes. I mean, they are large. I was able to record a show that put her on the spotlight with her classmates ripping on her for things... That was funny... Too bad shes too young for me... unless 17-18 is not bad... Too Kawaii... Oooh, it says she's never had a boyfriend b4, and the one she likes doesn't know shit to make a move... (conniving thoughts manifest) hehehehheheh..... (Man I wish I was back in tw) Too bad theres no student here like that... argh no ayu or hikki (ARGH SHE WAS MINE) clones here either... *sigh*

Honorable Mention goes to Cortizone5, who leads in the "people who view my subprofile" group with an astounding 18+. Which goes to show one thing... I have nothing fun to write about. And He still owes me lunch.

Did I ever mention I had to look out for six cheerleaders back in high school? I never volunteered for the operation, but somehow I got pulled in because 1) My teacher was also the sponsor and 2) they needed a sexist opinion of all their routines. So I was their maneeger and they were my girls. Hey, it beats running up the mountain to Dogshead for Xcountry or getting pounded in Rugby. I luv all those girls: Cat, Crys, Mon, Phyl, Amy, and Mich. Ive havent talked to any of them since about April or so, but I made contact again with Phylli, whose in Oahu. Our converstion was short since it was 4am and I needed to study, but aside from the quick gossip, it was a good talk... So good she had to quote a lame part of the conversation in her profile (I feel flattered):

"i was busy working this summer.." -me (Phylli)
"whatever. i can imagine you just bustin out on the dance floor..." -maneeger (Jon)
"what kind of image am i projecting here?" -me

Did I mention I love these girls? (I still have the love slave photo frame that they gave me with their group picture)

I stole this from one of the hsiung brothers, because I got a chuckle from it. Then I thought... This sounds alot like Fuzzy Memories....

One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my little nephew to Disneyland, but instead I drove him to an old burned-out warehouse. "Oh, no," I said. "Disneyland burned down." He cried and cried, but I think that deep down, he thought it was a pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real Disneyland, but it was getting pretty late.

WOOHOO, I have successfully merged my old and new contact lists of ICQ, and now It has 250 ppl. Now that I opened it, I can see all the old alumni that dont use AIM. So my desktop system tray is propogated with an AIm, MSN and an ICQLite. If you have ICQ, add me, be the 251st ICQ on my list: 1206331. or IM: awhuy, or msn: jonchiang@hotmail.com

Damn, I never have had a real birthday party in almost ten years. I guess its cuz my parents thought it would be better to just buy me stuff, and not surprise me. sure I've had some cakes and stuff, but the last time I really had a party was when I was maybe in 4th-5th grade. With a lot of people. I can't remember too many names except Amy Bennett and her sister Becky; Anina, Amber Rish, Leo, Josh(?)... hmm I can't remember that much... I have pictures somewhere... (it was at ChuckECheese)My earliest birthday was when I was 4, and I think the majority of the attendants were all girls, maybe a couple guys, but mostly girls... I have no idea how I can be close friends with all these girls when I'm four... I must have been brainWarped somewhere between my childhood and my current life. Aiyah... 3 more days... not party, no cake... no lycee or red bags or money, no car, no dog, no nothing... oh and a paper and a test... isnt that just GRAATE? fuck

I am sooo screwed. the law class is insane, with all this extra stuff I didnt see b4. The syllabus itself is 24 pages, where normal ones are like 3 pages.... ACK COURSEWORK IS COUNTED AND DUE ! ACK, I HAVENT SEEN ANY CLASSES! . ACK, I missed A COURSEWORK! ACK. I GOTTA STOP PLAYING VIDEO GAMES!

You ever realize after you smoke, your smoking hand smells like ass?

Eck, i think my head hurts..

Well that was fun and a waste of time.... Did I mention I miss tw, especially the partying till 4-6am? Man do I miss that. Or at least I miss, the staying out till 4-6am part. I miss random hot strangers at clus that were not soo crowded. I mis lesbians at clubs. I miss running around the club seeing all the candy I would never see in florida. I miss I miss I miss it all.

holy shit, did I write all that??? what the hell ws I thinking last nite?? eek! gan ah! oh well, no one reads anyways. U people make me sick (O.o)

Jon thinks jon is in 4th gear. Jon is open to suception, and jon is thinking distorted but, jon is good.

Earlier today I went to the home gators game with liz. This is cuz liz was going to go with lori (some other girl) but lori backed out and troi didn't want to go, so I'm thrid fiddle, but it doesnt matter because it was fun. It rained alot and hella people, bt it was good. Troi's fault.

Later that night, I went to Eden (the club) with Kosol and his friends, got to the ckub. Saw some people. Ran into most people. It was alright, not a sausage market, and at least there was a ton of asians. At least it was like clubbing in tw, except all the ppl came with other ppl and most of the ppl are taken... DAMN... on top of that troi returned to circumnavigating me like before (he actually felt stupid not going to the game so he wanted to go to the club even though he hates club danceing and doesn't drink, which is the converse of clubbing) Jenny came with tommy and his friends. She drank a few drinks and got tipsy, She staggered alot, and almost fell a few times; me and tommy were basically grabbing on to her to make sure she didnt bang her head on the floor. I really love jenny when shes more relaxed after a few drinks. She basically sipped drinks from all the people she knew and came across. At this time she would be Fun Jenny(3rd-4th gear). fun fun fun, heehee... and supposedly she doesnt hate me...in any event, Jenny is more fun when she's clubbing and dancing and drinking =P

Ran into the Peter crew too. I havent seen them in a loong time. Like my chili and Ricky (my ex-roomate and chili's Bf) Tried to teach them the tw drinking game Shi-Swa-Swa, but teaching americanized TW islanders is hard...... So basically I ran into most all the people I see at the asian social events. Granted I didnt meet any new people or freshies.

After downing drink after drink after shot and a bottle of stuff in a short time, and hobbling around the dance floor, I slowly came to the realization and disappointment that angela didn't go (from my point of view). Why I would be disspointed? well, myphilosophy is that when you are at least in 3rd-4th gear, that is when you become an open book; it also turns the people who are anti-social into the life of the party. It also makes you realize what your heart really thinks. Maybe you havent seen your love or gotten booty, so your inhibitions call you to find a person to help you.... ohkay that part didnt make sense.... so sufficed to say i wish she went, but5 she didn't so i had to sublimate my hugs and mellowness with all the women I could find at the club. At least guiding jenny around the club was fun, but its like blind leading the blind around....

after all this nite and drinking and drunk jenga and 1.5 hours of clubbing, I'm tired, soo tired...I still think I like all these women. Maybe i drank too much... what am I saying. it must all be the kamikaze... i dunno... I just know nothing can come out of it for various reasons... reasons I can't remember because I can't seem to remember anything past today right now... fack, that sooo sux. heheh...

Final note:Jenny did look real good at the club, but she was reaaaally gone more or less, cuz she was leading me everywhere and she ended up accidentally going to the men's room and just standing in there, and some guy came in and, i guess, thought it was the women's room so then actually went into the ladies room thinking it was the guys room... ........ why did J go to the men's room? i can't remember....My head hurts, I thought too much, I talk too much... pains of the heart and mind and body.... I dressed up way more than normal for nada.

Oh, played drunk jenga next door. the guys are funny, in a weird way.
4 days till I get older.
Hope I wake up to go picnic this afternoon.
I'm a hypocrite; I think I'm backing out of my own thoughts I made in the past.... ergh. Hao Gu Dan
If none of this makees sense, don't worry, I prolly wont understand this when I read this sober either.... That's love, I mean bacardi silver.

friday: Still missing a few classes, and still being late for class... Oh well.

I Hung out with Phong (one of the people from uf). Me, him and Javier basically drove around talking and getting grub. From the conversations, I found out that there is more to phong than I first thought of him... Come to think of it, I don't know what my past impressions were. He has some interesting stories too... and

We drove to Van and Tevin's place to see whats up over there. When we got there, I forgot van had a childhood friend staying at his place...of course, that was quickly remembered when I came into the room and there was a girl sitting on the floor primping herself to go out... a pretty girl too. Seems to be in good shape... anti-social though, except to her love interest... and supposedly a smart ass student; shes only 18-19 but creditwise a college senior.... hows that for making us all seem old. Five minutes of seeing thos roomate of van's and I already put her on the list of cute girls... but i guess that because she was in makeup mode, not in normal mode (which she's never in)

I remember I had a conversation in tw with either rich or sister michelle. About makeup.... its amazing how makeup can turn a woman who was not born with natural beauty into a babe. You see it all the time... A normal girl you wouln't talk to; slap on an hour or so of makeup, and bam, new infatuation. So, what happens when you add makeup to someone who is already hot? do you get super hot or hooker? or maybe the wrong makeup or too much makeup makes you into a slut. And makeup is mostly is for the females... although I remember this one guy james back in NY liked to wear makeup, we used to have small rips with him cuz he really liked makeup and Rammstein (what a weird combo) But sufficed to say, the rest of the male population would not wear makup, unless forced into help testing it for a woman on a browse through the cosmetic department.God thats sad.

Life sucks without a car. Life sucks without good friends with cars that would pick you up to go to a party. I need a car... Obviously I cant make a beerrun on my birthday to get pissdrunk, but I guess that means I should be studying my ass off for the test that day. I need a car, so I can go where I want and blow off who I want. Cuz uf is really just another interim, another 2 year interim just like my life always is. Yup Yup.

Some rv's outside... not a big game today UF vs some crap team. Ooh, I played Warcraft... Wat a massacre, even 4v3computers... rape on us... argh

Liz and troi worked things out... finally... So now troi can go back to hating me. It's a cycle. One day I want to hear what thesse arguements about me sound like (well its not always me)

PARTY TONITE! STUDY TOMOROW

i made random music pop up.... ppl with no broadband, or if you have any problems loading it, comment, cuz im testing it out, and i cant tell with my T3
I have 3 songs on here

yeap eap, jenny hates me; what else is new... when did she ever NOT hate me...

One of these days Im gonna edit the page and add linked pictures so you can have an idea who these people are, like liz troi jen ang van and the rest of the yahoos. but that time will have to wait until after i get a larger drive and finish my test after my birthday. which means im also behind my "get the group site up to keep in touch" site. But what else is new... At least im making it to all the live classes now.

troi- yup yup, still not liking me still.
On the plus side, tevin the nice guy of the group maybe getting the hookup, in essence being in the lead of all the rest of the guys so far this year. Kudos

I'll make this short...
liz had a huge fight again... i think they can't resolve their differences.... or i think troi has had enough or is oblivious to the problems or is comfortable moving on to another person... makes for weird but good drama... in a way.

Uan has once again proven to me why it is NOT a good idea to be a woman's confidante, from his own observations... and the story he told... a little shuddering...granted I would be intrigued by the details about the intricacies of the confessions, but still, i would find it taunting to be a confidante to a girl you would like to tap but couldnt tolerate, especially if she takes up half of your living area, and tells you things that make you go "dude we may be old friends, but we still opposite sex's, so stop tellin me!"

Did I mention I am really partial to blonds? Like blonds with some color (tan) and overall nice everything else too... Like Lissa, or that girl in my Consumer Behavior class. I like her light blonde hair, and when she sits in the pull out chair during class, the only way for her to move her hands from her lap to the desk table is to navigate through her ample chest... yeah baby 0.O the two good things about this class... and shes got a nice lower half too, but I think since shes blond it sorta cinches it (shes prolly a Greek too)

When I mean partial to blondes, that doesnt put out the rest of the people. I am partial to woman who have at least some partial asian ethnicity in them... Point being, today after class, sitting in the Student union, leaving the arcade ready to go home, stop by the smoothie shop and there is this hot ass brunette there. Shes got these pouty lips like denise richards (or angelina jolie more or less) and her hair was done up so it made her appear more elegant, aside from her stretchy tight black dress and shoes she wore (stretchy tight dress like how the ho's dressed up the first time I encountered Carnegie's the Bar). From the dress you could guess the contours of her body, and she was in pretty good shape; not a flat flat stomach, but at least it wasnt flubber either... I could tell she had a hint of some asian in her (like Kreuk). Then she left... *sigh* that was one fine ass dressy girl off to some social function. Hell, me and my man Trey were doing a post-analysis as her ass left the building... (sorry, im a little deprived here; UF fish barrel is filled with skanks and bitches, and all the probable ones are taken or crazy).

Nothing else... Gotta sleep better... I found out my classes have tests soon.

Im soo old... but not as old as rich.

Im in love with Ayumi Hamasaki.But AHHHH, shes older than me by a year or two!!!!
Another Ayu site

Not much else to do, Im sleeping too much, I dont have enough Ayumi posters and pictures on my walls... oh btw, does it seem more and more japanese (or at least jpop) people have big eyes and full lips? Just like anime characters. Sometimes I wonder how Yu can construe me as an anime character. I dont have big eyes. Maybe when Im bug-eyed =P

AYU VS HIKKI

Boring entry, not for the soft at heart. Oh yeah, I added an mp3 song on the top to characterize my life this year. Only good for broadband.

Sat., after I failed to find my Progressive agent, I was walking back home when I came across this squirrel in the middle of the sidewalk, next to a University Police cop. The squirtle was breathing slow and didnt scurry when my foot was 1 foot away, and I went its front side and it looked like it was going to pass away right there. It had mottled fur and everything and as I squatted down and looked at it, it slowly got more tired and slowly began closing its eyes as its head came closer to lying on the floor. I thought, how sad, I cant let it die like that. The cop said, "Someone should smash its head and put it out of its misery," but I dont have the heart to squish its head, so I did the next best thing and scared the shit out of the critter, enough to get his adrenaline going and snapping him from his fatigue. Then the thing looked like it was gonna rabies me, but it scurried off to find a private funeral. Thats the aweness of life. I was interested to see the life force leave this fluffy rat, but I didn't want it to end its life as sidewalk kill.

UF lost to miami badly. Bucs lost to whoever, not as badly. Grammatica kicked a tie-ing field goal as the clocked reached :00, sending the score to an OT of 20-20, but then the QB got pushed back to the endzone and threw and INT so the other team won.... But I always said TB games were nailbiters.

From what I heard, there are about 4 steps to courtship. 1) Talking, where the two ppl chat. 2) Seeing, you are seeing someone. 3) Dating, you are dating someone. 4) Going out with... someone. I dont know exactly how the lines btwn them are defined but thats all I know. This is completely different from the stages with the SimGurl

Boring stuff you don't need to read(if you get blind trying to read this, its not my fault)
Jenny has been very tart with me over the past 3 days. Sometimes shes nice, sometimes shes really nice, and the rest of the time shes like cruella deville, and blows me off. I swear.... Conversely, I met this girl named Jennifer Chang today, she's pretty nice; athletic type a littele, or likes to work out, but I think shes a 2006 student (waay too young)

I bit the bullet and asked Angela for help to Walmart and the supermarket sunday. Normally I would put her on the lowest of the list because of our priors, but since I already bugged jen last time for a ride, and van and them dont have cars persay except through troi, and you know how my thing with troi is (if you haven't go check back a week or so ago) and no one I know has a car that I would talk to.... so all these factors led me to my fatal choice. Well, she finally picked me up at like 1 and we were at walmart and Albertsons until literally 5 or so. It was more or less alright, but I still don't like it. not because she's an outgoing person and so she likes to be flirtyish (I did nothing to provoke anything, she started it), but its probably cuz shes like that while shes seeing someone in Miami. officially, I don't give a shit toward her outer relationship because I just don't care (although as a RumorMill hub, it would be imperativeto know). Its just... I don't like mixed msgs. I just needed a ride to walmart, some help doing stuff, thats all, in a strict working relationship, not like the past. But shes like Poison Ivy (the villain, not the plant), so it makes for a very difficult resistance. Well, I'm never asking for her help again unless I shoot myself in the head or I'm SOL for other help. God I wish I had a car.

more than a week before another boring b-day... Oh yeah, if you want to find me on AIM, its awhuy the 18th is also when a marketing lab is due and CASA has another meeting... ugh....

Rich is evil!!!!

Its almost threepm and I spent almost an hour looking for my insurance adjuster who is tailgating outside. He has my check for the totaled Civie, but I sorta forgot the things he told me to look out for, so Im basically in a rut cuz theres a check for 12k and I cant get it cuz there are a thousand ppl outsde wearing gator or miami shirts and I cant find the specific 25-30 year old wearing the "1" jersey that has my forms.... *sigh* lets try again.... Oh yeah , while I was inside the library, this fat brunette bitch gave me lip about using my cell phone in the library... I restrained myself from saying "Bite Me hag" but if she does that again, I can just say," rascist white bitch lose some weight or step off" cuz Im looking for my money.

In a melody:I am so old.... I am so old... Kristin is younger than me. Ayumi is too, and so is Britney.... I am so old!

Went to some place called Atlanta Bagel Factory or something.... I cant remember the name exactly, but the food was pretty good, except for their less than average Bread. Spent a while at Frankie (my ex-roomate) and his boys crib across the hall. Fell asleep on the couch back home watching Mario sunshine.... I told you it was boring.

Id like to rescind the thing I said last time about people playing around with me. Because I play around with other people. I just didn't realize it until today as I did what I usually do to Kim and Annie. But unlike the Golden Rule, if I stop, its not going to stop unto me.. Actually I think it rubbed off on me, so thats why I reciprocate. Its one of those dog does cat world or something.

Wow, Im gonna be another year older in 12 days. The car adjuster is coming up to the UF-Miami game, so he can give me some papers and my 12k check for the car... technically this would be the largest amt of a birthday present I can get. But still, money can't buy love, it can buy lust, but not love. Speakingof which, yeap, no love in gainesville, nothing here... nope nope nope. Its so sad. and Im still not into the school groove that well... proably since my computer has no speakers so i cant listne to the lectures in my room... aiyah... maybe I should get RF headphones.

So thursday made it to chinese, and my friends john and Phong decided to jump out of the closet as transexuals today. Both wore dresses and alot of other things that made me and alot of others wish we werent asian today. Apparently it was for Human diversity class. They were the most diversely exceptional of this 300+ class of costumed clowns (it looked like a bad rocky horror picture show). Jenny Rice looked pretty nice, though she said she had more makeup on b4 clas and it washed off during lunch... i think she was trying to pass off for a hooker (yeah, that would be good). Angie put some weird clothes on, but it wasn't as wowing as the two homos. Oh, and John won. I think. God, I do not want to be in that class to do what John did (he shaved parts of his head).

I really shouldnt be bothered by troi. We're just never, ever.... evere ever ever ever ever ever ever ever, gonna get this settled. Period. Dork.

Went to Bentos to eat. Jen took me. It was a dinner get together setup by tommy. Some people were there, Roger was there. I dont think I needed to go, but I did tell her I was hungry and didnt eat.On a similar note, I haven't heard her talk about her ex in a while, so does that mean they really really broke up.... again? Its sorta the nth time, and they usually get back together, but I haven't seen her pine too much, so this time it may be different, or is it.

12 more days till im older. My best friend lent me deteredent. My homegirl took me to get Zhen Zhu Nai Cha. I harassed Annie and Kim. I surpassed my roomates Mario Sunshine game. I beat Zelda 64, I got my pride and dignity ripped to shreds (that I wont go into detail), ohh and I have no car. I think thats all. Ooh, but Transformers and He man are on tomorrow saturday, so I can watch that, afterI I watch some damn tv classes.

I found out natalie portman's real name in may from the harvard newspaper the one time she wrote a rebuttal editorial to burn some guy. I checked the site again, because its a bookmark, and they actualy changed her name to portman instead of her real name which is Her****ag. Well if she didnt want to have her name printed out in the first place maybe she shouldnt have used her real name then. Shes still pretty adorable in the intellectual sense. Yeah, a nice Jewish girl.

Oh yeah, that girl Win from the Jian Tan group actually came on and messaged me. Actually she forgot which person exactly I was since I was rollin with a crew, but then she remembered and we had a nice chat about how florida has nice hot weather and canada has nice cold weather... something like thaT. It wasn't that long a chat; she has a job for someone that is about my age (wait a minute.... I shoulda graduated... OIC)

Went to the Vietnamese Student Org and the Chinese-American Student Assoc meetings in the past two days. Yeah they were both boring, and I didnt see that many cute faces... besides the current ones.

On a final note, I still am a major argument between liz and troi even though I havent actually talked to or hung out with liz in days, but the bastard just seems to not resolve the issue in a mature way. I swear he probably only talks to me when he has a big big fight with liz and he can't find a way to find out why or talk to her so he has to route through me. Hey, I'm being hosed again. Fcuk.

I think my roomates are reallly really a bad influence on me... I have to get more studying down. I'd love the study time at jennys if studying was more than 3/4 of the time... and maybe if I knew what I was studying for. And maybe if I got my book... Thats all. Just study.

angela still is playful with me. Ive been trying reluctantly to disregard it, but its hard when someone decides to sit on you when your working on the computer (well, ok i wasnt working, I was gawking at the superlong useless entry rich had). I should really not respond to her playfulness, but you know its sorta diffucult when a woman is sitting on your lap. Its almost similar to how jenny and her sister like to verbally abuse me whenever they can. Honestly, can I have some normal friends?

I found out why no one has called my phone in the past couple days, especially the insurance adjuster. Turns out Voicestream suspended my phone.... AGAIN.!!! WTF? Geez, last time was because my bank rejected the card sale, if its the same shit again, I am going to go on the bitch-scalle and fucking talk off the black lady that answers again.... Mofo dicks.

Got picked up by jenny to go study at her place... but it really didnt go into studying cuz they were watching americal idol, and I think it was safe to assume we were all hungry. So after getting boba tea from Bento's (FYI: Boba milk tea w/ pearls is really Black Pearl Milk Tea, aka. in pinyin zhen zhu nai cha), we drove one whole damn block to wendys to get Baked potaters. Hows that for lazy.

Richis really getting hopeless with his site. Now hes putting porn keywords in so others will hit him on google, but it doesnt work, cuz I tried a word and his didnt pop up... I told you it was hopeless.

Im really beat after the test in chinese, sooo tired, and yet I feel so empty. Not from the lack of food that I dont have or any worthwhile fun... no, its the lack of a car. Everyday I live without a car pushes me further and further into a frenzy ever so slowly. My mind is literally beating the crap out of itself everytime I want to go somewhere far but realize I have no 4 wheel planet killer.

Its a good thing I didn't go back home with Jen, because I think she was real late in getting back and thus I would have missed my first quiz in chinese. I couldve circumvented all that with a car... but nooooo.... etc.

After polling my site with my ex-roomate and some other people, I've come to the realization that yes I seem to have anger problems or a torrent life eh? I mean, have you actually seen a couple entries that were really upbeat; havent most of them been somber and stuff? Yes, life sucks, nothing is good. I bet if I were a woman, this would be alot more happier or full of glee. But it ain't sooo boo hoo.

Oh, i have to stop this short. I have to revoke jenny as my friend, because she picks on me too much, so i never will help her again... MUAHAHAHAH YOU ARE THE ENEMY , not my friend!!! GRRRRR

I really want to sleep but I fear Im not going to wake up for the first quiz in chinese class, so I figured I just stay up and maybe try to get some of the boring lectures in for a couple hours.

To date, troi has IMed and/or called me a total of 4x thus far since school started. Almost every time, it was never small talk or anything; usually it was asking for my help or a question or something. Truthfully, I dont know anything to talk about with him. We've had some close deep talks last winter when it was converning my problems, but thats of the past. We still know nothing of each other. True, I dont know much from most of the people at school. But still, troi was one of those people that doesn't really talk for his (more or less) people. I cite last november where his big mouth cost me a probable relationship. I can't be mad at him for that for a long period, but it will still bear in my mind as what stuff not to say to other people. If you dont know anything about me, fine, then keep that mouth shut and don't make inferences. Last thing I need is another fucker talking bad smack.

A little cranky, cuz I didnt get the ride back to Tampa with jenny because of the school work I still put off. I really am going nuts without a car. This isn't NY or Boston, or any concret jungle. My god, its a goddamn farmland with horny people in their prime. The clubs and bars are soo packed its like wading through waist-deep mud in the club.

I have to get to publix (a supermarket) soon. An old middle-school classmate of mine works there and I haven't told her about my summer trip. I also have to get myself organized a little more with school. I dont have a regiment, and i need to put down some volunteer work. *Sigh* Its just gonna be another tough year for the Dr., or should I be calling my self the eminent esquire?

Well, its been a long while since i wrote something because Ive been doing some thinking and i havent done too much hw; basically i have stayed at home since friday and done nothing but play video games like Zelda, Monkey ball, and Mario sunshine; I did run yesterday, but I havent showered since maybe thursday nite.

I think me being in chinese 1 is a joke, but theres a quiz on monday on Pinyin style, and Im more of the zhuyin kid, so i have to work my studying for that... on top of that, I havent looked at any of the tv classes yet... yeah, the first week and im already not doing anything still.

I lost contact with the older woman. I met her at the Outback Bar where she works during my last week of summer freedom, and we've had some banter through email. But she wrote me a stop mail after having a conversation with rich... something about we're so far apart in age... some issue like that. I dont know; there were 3 emails she wrote me withint a 5 hour period and i only skimmed the first couple sentences of the latest one. Thanks alot rich, if i ever need help, i wont have to ask cuz youll just give it anyways. dammit, if i want to learn about the trials and tribaliations of relationships with older people, wouldn't it be better to go through it at least than not at all? Sorta like I dont believe in religion until God or some supreme being does a little magic show outsde my window. I swear no one understands me or goes through the life I've endured. Maybe liz, but that's because I relate her naive innocence to yesteryear. But anyways, so now we're probably not going to talk through email now; I was just getting to know her too. Now I have one less thing to look forward to when/if I go back.

In other news, Its labor day and i didnt go back home to get all the extra stuff I need because I have damn studying to do. My room is a mess, I have no car, and I probrably will not have a car within my 16 day deadline. So no going out my birthday then. Oh and after redefining what a fried to me is, I really only have 4 reliable friends thus far: Jen, Liz and Cozensa and Van, and the rest of the acquaintences are total assholes until proven wrong.

what a great fucking life.