LSATS are in

I'm scared now.

ahh!!! CRAP

JOJO is coming back tomorrow (today) morning!!! ahh!!1 I thought they would stay till after the ball dropped?!?!?! WTF?? AHHH!!! I have to clean up this house!!!

damn... fat like a donut

heres one sure sign you really need to do some serious activity... when you start having vein discoloration on the leg area... yeah, its getting scary... I'm gonna find the best gym to use and go everyday in the morning, i hope... need to keep a pattern... otherwise im gonna die... yeah, die... at least lose the weight to the legs, cuz thats where all the weight is going, that and my neck and gut... yeah...

going on a fact finding mission

yeah... i love you all that come to the secret site that will still be here after all the asses on xanga give up on their fad, but i need more headcount... I'm going to hop around on alot of people's blogs and hopefully amass a huge following, and flirt with women i dont like. its better that way than being played on women i do like... so, hopefully, i'll have a higher hitcount soon...

Oh, replacing Rich's spot on the Link List with this girl's site I usedta go to when I first started blogging. The best part of her site blog then was when she introduced rich and us to the simgirl game in the summer, and us guys spent all night at aztec trying to see how many days we could hit, instead of playing Counterstrike.

Here's something you don't need to know about i ran outta clothes to wear... well, not exactly, i just ran outta undershirts... since uncle left for new york and the dry cleaners is closed, and this damn house don't have no washing machine... so... i have to start wearing the stinky shirt... but at least the overshirts are not stinky... same for my pants, though i am running out of underpants too, and socks is going to get in a bind soon... damn... wish i could break into a store...

There is nothing big going on in the world today... obviously since everyone passed out from eating too much for the holidays...

Why Mark Harmon is cool.

I dunno why... hes just cool... i dunno where I have seen the man, but he makes NCIS watchable... so when he was on West Wing, i thought it was cute how CJ Cregg liked him and though i saw his death coming a mile away in irony, i was still saddened and hurt inside... really... i almost wept... but i guess people like that de all the time in west wing... Still... hes like the take no shit guy... which is why he makes Navy Ncis watchable... except for that Goth Chick in the show... shes scary... i wouldnt be surprised if she scared away the audience... Sometimes I think Mark Harmon and David James Elliott are Related... I dunno... its a vibe... oh, jags nice to watch too, but i think its mostly because of Catherine Bell and her stupendous assets, oh and her jugs... but its cool that she is such a biker chick and still looks in great shape after a kid... argh... aight, the west wing marathon is over... time to sleep, all alone in this house... no women here to entertain... *sigh*

oh shit.

i forgot if i'm a registered democrat or republican.... crap...

so, like i said, im not bitter... i could go watch a movie with lily sunday... dunno... or i could go to miami, if TIM treats me to lunch since he OWES me from that time at Grilleworks... yeah, don't think i dont remember that... ... hmm... i gtg online and find bobby, maybe he can help me out, i hear he lives in miami too... this is why i dont like going south.

hey lauren!

I have never her that girls voice in, ever... its weird... someone you banter with on aim, and you have no idea what they sound like... they could be a jessica simpson, or a patty and selma... hahaha... i'm bored... I've played with xanga too much.. i think its just to weed out the people that are spying on my xanga... i hate them all... except bob... hes an idiot, but i'll respect him in the afternoon... you should see all his dumb poses.. priceless little cow.

An Op-Ed for the Mindless (maybe)

An Op-Ed for the Mindless (maybe)

I'm heading down to miami soon... no one lives in miami that I can rely upon for a night... *hint* HInt.!!!

gimme a room!!!

can you tell that I'm still somewhat down?

cmon, its pretty much out there... if i ever had this blog during junior year, you would see an epic post, but fortunately for you, u dont. Van downplayed the situation and the intensity of this whole thing, but My intuition is pinging that he's hiding his true feelings. I'm sure he'll miss her when shes gone, now after finding out that hes had on him a crush b4, and he on her... thats the problem with feelings for angela thats past the normal ladder, she pulls at your heart. I think I've stated before in my mind that my life probably would be better off if i just kicked her away the minute she wanted me to save her from herself. I mean, my palm reading says I am a woman's pussywhip... but, I've been raised by mom, so, i can't say no unless i am not feeling like being altruistic... so its just as well and inevitable that someone that some chick who jumps on my back the second i step into my first club in gainesville warranted some attention, but not all of it... that was my mistake... do you get me?

shes a good girl, she means well, but, contrary to what the populace says, she is a bit off-center. why hide a relationship from your friends, are you afraid of it? afraid of what the friends would think? I think thats already too late for that. also, in my months and months here, i dont think the girl ever had a long lull of not being in some relationship... this maybe part of that fear of abandonment that she has. its my assumption then that she has an insatiable appetite to keep a relationship at all times, mostly b4 shes out of the lop too long... this is the love-oriented life... as opposed to the career-oriented life, where you value not failing classes and a good school outlook over getting your winky licked...

I think what those two people forgot in their attempted coverup was who they were dealing with, me. Given my knack of being more keen of anything related to that girl, and their sloppiness at tying up loose ends (the accord next to my civic was the worst mistake), it makes you think if they weren't really planning well, if their judgement was clouded with the idea that they would just get time to doze off in the same bed...

So, they screwed up, i found out, i freaked, i smoked, smoked, smoked, smoked, and i became partially enlightened, and after all that, i took the remaining feelings left and, instead of putting them in the bottle where all duress and stress get holed up, i beat the fuck outta them and cast them into the darkest part of my mind, hoping to never dwell upon them again (horrible metaphors, eh?) During this enlightenment, i put her back onto the same level she was last year, during her korean-bf time. That made me feel relaxed to flirt and not feel it anymore. (god, maybe i should go goth)... anyways... too much typing... gtg...

Bottle of Emotions (Reprise)

I've been having this hunch and suspicion that has been popping up since Friday after potluck at van's poker night. My suspicions were totally right, which leads me to think I am a god in detective work, if I ever decided to work in that field, but i would suck since it would take a long time to actually figure out the hunch... or, to prove it... And here is my hunch: angela and van have a thing for each other.

I guess that would have been inevitable, right? here's how it is broken down: I've told van from day 1 most any pertinant information about her. she has had him around to relate her boyfriend issues... it would serve such that in the long run, this chatting would make her like him, like how kim (this other miami girl) confided in him and eventually develop feelings for him... But, I guess, i never thought about this situation: A and V. Thats until the pieces came in slowly and ended in this climatic face-punching.

1: Secret Calls: Van's been talking a long time on tevin's phone... it doesn't seem odd, unless you think that hes using a cell phone to call locally, or is he really calling long distance?

2: Up at the door: The night me and Scott went to his place in the start of our sleepin week stay, angela pops by. yeah, maybe she wants to be part of the guys, maybe not. no alarms here.

3: Potluck for Casa: Angela happens to be there, and shows up at poker night later at vans. then , not ten minutes into playing the game, she leaves to go drink with her drinking girl. Right as she was out the door, there was Van going out right after her... now, this seems a little freaking weird, odd if you will... yeah... this was my first obvious sign... where my head was exploding with conspiracy theories inside... i mean... you don't follow a girl outside your own apartment that you are hosting ... unless... there is something going on... and there is something going on.

Ok, so now I'm starting to grind my inner grindstone of thought. You know... the what-ifs. . hmm... where was I going... sorry... someone just happened to call van right now.... I wonder who.... so, anyways, my gears are grinding, because I'm sure this damn thing was inevitable... but I wasn't sure this would happen like this... after all, she was with her last boyfriend for the last 13 months... and then she just happens to dump/breakup with him, and all of a sudden she decides ... no... starts calling here? coming over? its a messed up world, but you cant change it.

4: Wrong Place, Wrong Time, or is it?: So, do you want to go into the climaclimax of my story? (Oh, btw, the door in van's room is fully shut now... with a click... that just proves it even more... god I am sooo right... I prolly was right with the jenny thing....) back to the story... Me, Scott and Angelo leave the Sunbay apt where van lives to drop him off and get some soda around 3ish... we come back to sunbay and chilll at andy's house, whose room is exactly under van's room... his room (van) is dark, hinting that he is actually sleeping because he failed a class because he forgot to go, and he has a class to go to next day... .... so, under andy's room, we're under van's room in andy's room and I hear footsteps from van's going to the door and then coming back a minute later... andy kicks us out from his aopt so we went up to van's, which is tevin's apt too (roomates)... normally the ro the door is unlocked for all intents and purposes, but this time, it was freaking locked. we go
"wtf?" and tevin unlocks the door... scott starts to play the ps2, and so i go downstairs to go get something from my bag in the car... and guess what... theres a familiar car next to mine... and guess what, her name is angela.... This is where everything fits into fcuking place... everything comes together like the random letters and sequences in "A beautiful mind." Then the inevitable postulate has been formed for this sequence...: Angela is here, Angela is in Van's room... There is nothing else to explin thee otherwise... tough beans...

after that everything else fit into place... all events and variables that seemed to not make sense then, make sense now... .... even as I type, at 9:01pm, Angela is t speaking to van on her cell phone as she waits to see the lord of the rings... hence, his shutting the door, hence... the secrecy... I mean... its me... and with the issue regarding me... (all issues regarding me has some end to hide it from me) van and angela would hide it from me. Not like I care... ok... fuck... i care... but after finding out this way, i'm staggered and fumed that my first instinct is to run out the door and get a pack of smokes to kill myself slowly... after that... I've notched down a bit... perspectivewise, I can't say shit, or do shit, because I'm not here in gainesville... I can't give any guarantees to anyone that could be hours away, especially as H-maint as Angela... my outlook at something between us has always been, since I left UF, distant friend, though, somewhere in my mind, i may have had those feelings dwelling in the bottle of emotions. I talked this down with the only other person I can with this situattion when I can't rely on van nor angela, and they said its fucked up, but its life... true. And the fact is, im going back south to tampa... shes going to boston for 4 months, and van will still be in gainesville, where the women are... my future with her is not written, nor will it ever be as far as i can tell (my innate feelings are not reciprocated), and love sucks in my future line of work. 3 years of law with no love abound.

so, in my thought... fuck it, I'm past my prime... college's for young drinkers, for me, is over... I don't condone what happened, but i can not detest it either, and frankly, my opinion to them is moot, isn't it...

now, I feel better. I feel a little better. Van is my only neutral buddy; Angela is the only one whose pulled my heartstrings to the point of breakage. I just wished one of them had the balls to tell me before I figured it out.

akira is coming

anyone ever see Akira? remember in the movie the leader of the bike gang had a cool red bike that was like a racer but u site like a cruiser? well, suzuki has a concept that puts the idea to life, with its G-Strider... it looks so cool and large, like the akira bike, but then you remember that its a diferent riding position and it may have automatic transmission. How much fun would that bwe>? wooooo

i think im mormon!

well, now we can all get along... scott and i spent the night playing a board game with liz and troi, the settlers of catan... its some game where you try to build roads and cities to win... pretty simple game... cept i sucked it up so horribly in the first game... the second one, i had a good position, but the damn dice kept rolling for scott... how sucky.... besides that me and liz and scott spent the precending hours at barnes reading... boring...

For people who don't know, Sadamn Hinsane is caught... after months of searching, the man was wallowing in a hole hiding from people... where were you when you found out? I was greiving after losing 5 bucks... piss...

I really don't have any business plans... this thing sucks... blah... anyways... blog tomorrow.

Miss Me?

sorry, havent had time to update... i know tim is goin "where the fuck is he?????" so, lets break it down to simple sentences... angie blew me off... fcuk that.... played two poker nights.... both 5 dollar bank... first was 1 dollar profit, second was me up 15 then losing it all cuz angelo was a dick and tried to cheat me outta 80 cents. played risk 2012, first time... good thing i had the upper hand and cowhead and me allied to keep off the people... whoo... every turn of the 5 years, i got at least 15 extra forces... in the end... i coulda wiped everyone out, but i wanted to keep what i had... that was sooo fun... anyways... everything had been decent... except that my professor dicked me outa a recommendation, so i need to find another one... damn... good thing i dont have to go back home anytime soon... feel a little bad not calling mom until the day after her birthday, her time.... my time it was still on time.... anyways....sighj... anyways... gtg... stuff to do... blah... oh, got my new phone... it kicks ass... ass kicking...

in ganesvile

two days so far... boring... smoking... heres some things i wanted to say... Raren, I lub ya, even though you only post once a year and only because you talk manic depressive, and you should post pics or something... or send me pics of the snow there...

angies been online more often... albeit, not there... besides that... life in gainesville really sucsk... i like the candy at the mall with rocco... at least im realizing there are more cute girls there than i originally thought...

no editorial today... check back next time...

one day, dreamweaver

tomrrow is the day... my range is 155-162, sorta... hopefuly, i'll shine... this makes me wish tim could be my doppleganger and take it for me, cuz like my prof says, standardized tests are for pussies...

found my electric blanket (HALLEELUULAH), now im not freezing,,, its like warm... oooh, warm... course, some of the boxes that were in the shed were destroyed, dunno how... its baffling...

~Dream of being a power ranger again... dreamed about some super man who could deflect bullets with some force or field, and make the bullets fly around and kill the shooters, (weird) , then fly around, then i dreamed about some star trek spin-off with Q, and some old picard, and in the end of the power ranger episode, was a group of ppl and one of them was Thai, the really cute girl with the weird persona...

I'm going to formulate a new way of differing from my thoughts, and good editorials... in the future... after the test.... not now...

sigh

still studying... still getting a 156 or so... damn those 30 questions...

today, im heading back to tampa... it was a good month here... yeah... i just hope my drills have prepared me for the coming doom.... can't blog, gtg print stuff out b4 the network goes down again

hi, thanks for commenting so far, but the quota is still seriously low, and im sure there are more of you than just two ppl, so if you havent hit the things said, do it.... mean time, hit the X-log for pictures of chi-town, cuz im lazy to write in both journals for once.
HERE