god, i hope my bill isnt ball breaking

gotta make this quick, I'm being kicked outta the lab... to date, Ive swapped pic msgs with miss more than like 20 times... so, that would mean, I think I owe 5 dollars of extra charges... crap... and I hurt my legs cuz I can't walk, oh cuz I did hip abduction/adduction...

and I slept till 2pm... anyways... yup, being kicked out... tgtg ... i hate stupid people.

nothing new

http://www.law.cornell.edu/index.html
I'm thinking about news aggregators... http://www.bloglines.com/

Girls that are High are super crazy

oh, btw, this isn't a stupid Creed song, but it is a perfect song. (see, now ur supposed to laugh and leave comments)

and if anyone has access to dreamweaver MX oftware and/or XP Pro (real), please let me know... I need to overhaul this layout, but I can't tweak the code or i lose the left pane somehow.

Love = trouble

I'm left to conclude that having some intimate relationship during your post-secondary education years can be a detriment to life... sorta... it goes from my observation that no one that I know who is in school should have the right to marry; in fact, they should be certifiably poor, with a plaque, until they have enough money to live nicely. Then, you can get married and knock up random hoes.... Ok, this post didn't make sense... sue me... I'm working on Apps... Stupid Boston University wants me to itemize my financial aid from undergrad... fcuk that!

Oh, Ralph Nader IS a narcissistic meglomaniac... Don't through away the vote!

Fun with Drugs, I mean, fun with ganja, i mean, fun with beer, I mean... ah screw it (Type:personal)

For the few that read, I'd like to explain about the horrors of turning one's stomach into a mixing bowl... These were the ingredients that went into said bowl chronologically: Fried Rice, mountain dew, percocet, bong, bong, blunt (the previous three went into my lungs, but its still part of the effect), beer, beer, be**... I didnt get the last one...... all that leads to fatigue, and then a spastic movement to chuck the mixing bowl into the bathtub...

So, heres the story... After dinner, chilled with Miss at GNC, like usual... Tom, the guy who drives a neon and was here last week, stops by. Closing time, we all drove to his place, which is a condo on the private beach area of the county... PLayed with his pet white rat... Then the fun started... First I swallowed a pill of a drug I have no knowledge of the name (for future thought, I don't think I should take a drug I don't know or have no idea the affects, unless it was "E" or Adderall)... then a beer, while hitting a spiral bong. Then, Van called b/c I called his ass earlier or so, i forgot, cuz the tolls of the bonging and drug and the beer have shattered my time-impression... anyways, talked for awhile, so i passed up the blunt a couple times, which annoyed Miss, I think, dunno... so hung up, started hitting that hard... then a few more beers... while the guy Tom was playing NCAA on Ps2, then Simpsons Road RAge ( I think he did, for i have a vague memory of bart simpson driving around a 3d environ in a shuttle; incidentally, b4 that and during the rest of time up to now, we all were flippin channels too up till midnite) up till midnite, everything was all like 4th gear... (see gears, somewhere in the first archives), but 4th gear then turned to "AU" gear, for the effects of mixing canibus, bud light, and this drug, made my normal gears (tailored for clubbing and partying) go awry... so I got really tired, and passed out for half an hour...

when i came to as i was abruptly shook awake by Miss, my body suddenly began tellin my brain "Hey stupid, we can't hold this, we're going to eject the crap" to which my mind commanded "make way for the TUB!" And thats were I ended up as the bowl dispersed into the tub... Then I rested for 3 hours, as my body was in no shape to coordinate foot-arm movement for a stickshift. The guy was cordial enough to let me rest, though i think we was trying to get some fuck with Miss. Through my passive movement near the tub (more or less dead), I could hear the guy ranting (after the girl left) about the MArdi Gras trip he agreed to go with (her). He just kept whining and groaning like "this probably isnt a good idea." "fuck, which did i agree?" and so on... In my retrospect, I'm laughing at him because he has to go, and its an 8 hour drive, and shes meeting up in orleans with her best friend sean there too, so it'll be three ppl, not 2 or 10...

oh, then i woke up, told the guy i was leaving, and finally headed home at 330 am...

whats the moral of this story? There is no moral!, like there is no one that read this whole page, cuz this post in particular blew!

actually the special notes of this envent were that I got really wasted from this... I puked the 3rd time while doing such activity, and this is the 3rd time I've had an event where I wasn't too sure of the events that took place at a certain point.

The moral is: don't mix shit... especially like me... I'm going to bed now, bye.

these are my probablities with my ugpa and lsat score

greater than 90% of the applicants with these credentials 48

greater than 75% of the applicants with these credentials 68

between 60-80% of the applicants with these credentials 17

between 40-60% of the applicants with these credentials 18

between 20-40% of the applicants with these credentials 20

less than 25% of the applicants with these credentials 71

less than 10% of the applicants with these credentials 50

All the good schools are in the 50... all the smart schools are in here... uf is in the 71
see the uphill battle?

incidentally:

Congratulations, Jonathan!
Your IQ score is 136

This number is based on a scientific formula that compares how many questions you answered correctly on the Classic IQ Test relative to others.

Your Intellectual Type is Visionary Philosopher. This means you are highly intelligent and have a powerful mix of skills and insight that can be applied in a variety of different ways. Like Plato, your exceptional math and verbal skills make you very adept at explaining things to others — and at anticipating and predicting patterns. And that's just some of what we know about you from your IQ results.

expanding my blogging mind (screw xanga again)

today, I decided to look up various blogs that I've bookmarked or stumbled upon recently... This is to help siphon me off the xanga activity time I've delegated in the day... More or less, I sold my soul to whore funny stuff on my xanga alias (fcuk that)If you forgot, it was this crappy site. I don't know how I let myself become sucked into the fad site of the weblogs. I should have heeded my friend MadTheory's ideology: fcuk xanga, its for whores. Anyways, free speech aside, I will be devoting more time back to my first love, my blogger ( I hope) until such time as I can afford my own domain, which i can't because $45/yr rent for domains can be used to buy food.

These are the sites I will be moving up to the front on my priority blogs. It will serve you good to browse them. Some are funny, some are informative, and some are just there because some cute chick owns it.
Rick Klau
XiaXue
Kop
Captain Ober

The purpose of weblogs (blogs) was to not only hold a place in cyberspace where the author can utilize his site like some cyber diary to discuss his feelings and inadequacies (or her stuff too), it was meant as a means for the author to excercise their 1st amendment right to free speech, including: opinions, commentaries, analyses, debates. Xanga bears a huge amount of people using their first amendment right to talk about their feeling with boys and girls, of sex, of idiotic things (see: Mine), but Xanga will not be able to evolve into a higher function the way that thousands of independent blogs in in the web have matured. I cite 3 of those 4 above. Hopefully I will be able to continue my fact-finding mission to locate more insightful blogs in the preparation to ready myself for law school (don't laugh, I don't want to be an inept doctor, regardless of uber-pay).

Those links will be moved to the new sidebar when that happens come weekend. By then I will be able to outline a better statement of purpose for this site; a site more than just an expression of my feelings and anger, but more a continuous, branching dissertation on the nation that I've come to known, the dunce that is the leader of the free world.

Blogs and bureaucrats

I decided to hit the campaign websites, because I was super bored after waking up yet again in the early afternoon (stupid alarm clock). More or less my main priority was to search the issues each candidate and the president were siding. This is also an attempt for me to broaden my understanding of current politics past the ideological curtains and stereotypes I've come to believe over the years.... What intrigued me was that many a candidate possessed a blog, what looks to be a daily blog, of happenings on the daily trail or the american government. I recall hearing that Howard Dean pioneered the campaign blog, but that could be shortsighted... It is interesting to see that thousands of people come on to the site, read the blog, and comment like the dickens... there are more comments on there than any xanga person's website, ever. When I have the time, I'll look into some of the comparisons between the candidates, but that will have to wait, for you see, today is the Wisconsin Primary, and I'm sure that if Kerry wins, Dean and Edwards will have to bow out.

Nothing today

I was going to discuss about the Democratic Debate, but unfortunately I slept the whole day away, like 11 hours... and that could also be from the long night I had at a friend's house getting used to Xbox Live while tearing up the battlefield in Crimson Skies... which is an awesome game to play unless ur a noob like me and only know one plane to use, otherwise, its a cool game... unlike the FPS turned console games, like Halo, Ghost Recon, R6...yadda yadda... actually lets talk about that.

lets go back to the original game that spawned the world of walking around and shooting things... Spear of Destiny, aka, WOLFENSTEIN 3d... yeah, you know that game, it was the original blockbuster that showed us it was cool to try and kill the super robotic Hitler... Then, came the game to be deemed the king of the original FPS after Wolf3d... DOOM... Doom was by far the best game to come out in its era, with scary ass dog monsters, flying skulls, and ugly ass minotaurs... it was truly a champion, from Id Software...

So spawned the other games that followed, Heretic, Doom 2, Duke Nukem, etc... all nice games that allowed you to blow the shit outta stuff in the name of whatever belief ur character loved... It was the release of Quake that raised the bar of FPS to a higher standard, REAL 3d graphics. Yes, I think all of use have played quake and remember such enemies as chainsaw-frag-freak, and our own fun weaps, like the nail gun...

Heres the thing that began a new way to kill... in the past... all the old games were pretty simple... use the dir keys to move the guy around... no mouse intended at all... you didn't move the gun up or down, the bullet would just fly up and hit the baddy if you had the thing aligned anyways... Now with Quake, you actually had to begin making your crosshair fit the enemy... and with keyboard buttons, thats a problem... Intro the Mouse/Key combo... a new step in the FPS where you control most the movement with the keys, sans the head movement, which was dominated with the mouse's precision software... In head to head battle... M/k beat solo Keyboard hands down... I should know... I was in a tournament of Quake (after playing soo much quake b4 and killing oh soo much) where I used nothing byt the board, and i made it to 3rd place, only to be bested by the top two seeds, who used M/K... yeah... served on a plate... that was the beginning of my training to use the mouse... and I got realllll good... I've trained countless dumb people in other games such as unreal and Q3 and Codename Eagle, ppl who until my tutorage, would just stand around as I jumped over their head and spun around to blast a hole in their back... the Age of the Mouse and Keyboard Campaign would seem as those nothing can stop it, or can it...

One of the only places where using kinematics similar to the keyboard was still in play was consoles... Goldeneye, Perfect Dark, Halo... All these games are played on their repestive systems, on controls... And since you can't use a mouse on an Xbox or GC or Ps2, how do people, hoards of gamers function? the joystick... We've de-evolved back to the joystick... if it weren't enough to have one, now we have two! Take Halo, a game that is truly a decent game, and would only be superb if they had a MOUSe... I like Mice... but they don't, they have a dual stick controller... And somehow, they have made people function with two sticks... and that amazes me... that amazes me because this is the society that has all but wiped out the little red nub on laptops of yesteryear, what was that, the Thumbstick... in favor of the glide pad, the closest clone to a mouse for a notebook... and now the idiot children of tomorrow resort to playing games that could be steller, with sticks AGAIN!? I for one, would enjoy Halo if I could aim my gun 300 percent faster with a mouse than the right analog stick... I'm too hard with the crappy controls anyway, I'm not a sensitive guy where I move it slowly... My rage goes into my fingers, which drive my gun and laser bolts into someone's head... I don't have time to denigrate myself with trying to be sensitive to sticks... thats for pussys... give me a mouse and simple button design for the consoles, and I will whip alot of ass on Halo 2.

my brother is so much smarter than me

I have in front of me a collage scrap book my brother made from the various editions of Men's Health magazines he owned... Its a big notebook, a good hundred or two hundred pages of info... its pretty decent. I started using the first excercise in the book, but I might switch to another excercis or put in other workouts from various parts of the book... also, I have to try and do this in the morning, cuz the book says you can probably drain more fat from you if you do your workout before breakfast.

I had a very hectic day... pulled allnighter, finished my final revision of the statement... expressed mailed my Application at the Eleventh Hour (I hope they still take it), and finally got drained to sleep in the afternoon, to wake up and go hang with Miss. then walk around Walmart, thinking of Federal Aid, and catch up on VCR shows... Talked with my brother... He's in wisconsin... They D primaries are tuesday, but hes a Rino... Republican in Name Only... cuz mom was a R for Reagan... I want to finish the rest of the apps this coming week, but I really need to focus on which schools I want to finally decide to set with as my last 5 or so choices... Maybe figure out what dates I might want to go to NYC to see VIcky and Jim and Anne, and finally meet back up with Alby and Helen, as well as the old crew that still exist in the jungle... crap... I need to call the other helen, or dave might know... or luke... Anyways... I'm sure my march area is pretty unscheduled, unless i take upon a job, but if i head to MAdison to help Bro move... then I shouldnt really have a job... I'm just a poor homeless kid... Shouldn't stare at Juggies... heh.

Anyways... I wonder if there is a campaign hq here in tampa for one of Kerry... I'd like to help with that... get some experience... or some Hope or Hospice thing... dunno.

... weeks at the gym... weights still the same...

fun with friends

argued with scott again... hes like, i can ruin ur reputation, somewhere in the arg... I'm thinking, go ahead ass, i dont talk to much anyone up there anymore, not like whatever crap u say can change things, I prolly won't be in this state come fall. but hes an ass... hes half a phong and me... talking with me its petty crap... talkin with lulu, its all cheesy. (yes, I'm being selective of my evidence, boohoo) that is so typical of guys.

anways... wonder if vicky is reading this... prolly not... so today she called cuz she wanted to see if i recommended to jimmy to take her to the MUSEUM of SEX for Vday... I'm like... hahaha, I wish... that wouldve been funny... The thing that was freaking me out was her voice... usually she sounds like a normal longisland cantonese... except for this conversation... she had this coy voice or cooing voice... basically it reminded me of one other person that would sound exactly like that, the girl in boston. I was saying "stop don't say anything, ur freaking me out." cuz really, it was starting to get to me... Its not to say thinking of Angela is disturbing me, I'm just putting in as much effort not to be reminded of her... when i don't want to be reminded of it... if I wanted to be reminded, I'll go find something to reminisce with, but not something thats gonna bang me on the head outta the blue... And one of the most poignant traits I remember of her, that will never escape me, is that voice, when she is sounding pouty and such... no other girl I know exhibits it to the fact that I characterize it with the person... Vicky sometimes does it, but this time it hit a memory neuron and then I felt like I was in the past, on the phone, keeping information from her to provoke her to use that voice... she's affective... argh... I'm distancing myself... I'll cloud my mind with apps... donkey's fucking (oops, that was lewis black just now) ..

Don't you hate it when you see or are exposed to something which cues something in ur mind of something or someone... it really sucks cuz when the memory triggers all the old memories flood back like a dam that contains your thoughts exploded.. why can't I be reminded of crystal or helen or sandy or ashley or kitty or naoko, or several of the other females that have passed through my life... succcks... i really wish I had been in any other popular asian state 4 years ago, any other state, than my home state... NY, MAss, Cali, Oregon... actually, it prolly wouldnt matter cuz this sequence of events would have happened regardless, just with some other person... at least there would be a higher freq of asians in nyu... like chinese... more chinese... more tas... blast....

aight... I'm pulling an allnighter to finish 3 sentences of an essay... i can feel my mind giving... but I need to keep up...

for added insight, check out the guy who commented the day b4, he has a nice site, something I wanted this one to be, if i had the time to be more informative and diligent to find information and paste it here... argh... by

the powers that be proclaim stalk thee

soo.. its not the girl who owns that accnt, its the friend of the girl who owns the accnt apparently... its the one from the trip01 02 pic... that one...

anyways, can't trust liz for shit... dunno if shes lying to me... never known this brash naive young kid to say some news that shocks me then rescind her news then say yeah its true then take it back... for one thing... that messes with my accuracy head... phones don't help delve the truth, and that sucks

toy freak

this is for me... this guy has way many more robots than i could imagine a person could own.. dammmn
http://www.collectiondx.com/users/jbernard/index2.asp

Brush With the Law
Buy the book

It takes three years to graduate from Harvard Law School, but does it only take nine days to learn how to practice law?

Is it true that at Stanford Law School you can earn a degree by flying into town for finals?

In their book Brush With the Law: The Turbulent True Story of Law School Today at Stanford and Harvard, co-authors and practicing attorneys Jamie Marquart and Robert Byrnes explain how they mastered getting a J.D. in absentia.

Marquart, Harvard Law 1998, and Byrnes, Stanford Law 1998, entered law school with the the thought that they would dedicate themselves to academics. They were quickly disilliusioned.

But they did not waste the next three years of their lives. While their classmates spent sleepless nights preparing for grueling Socratic dialogues, they pursued their own versions of legal education. For Marquart, it was how to count cards at casinos. For Byrnes, it was the pursuit of pleasure through modern chemistry.

Of course, they graduated and went on to be hired at top-paying firms.

Read on to find out how ...

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Fifty-Six -- Byrnes

With me and Tim Apparel in chemical, academic, and financial alignment, I spent the next two months writing and receiving e-mails. Between January and April, 1,260 e-mails passed between me and Dawn; 110,880 words, longer than this book. There was a critical plot point: From: Robert Byrnes
To: Dawn
Subject: recovered memory
niccola? she’s still in boston. From: Dawn
To: Robert Byrnes
Subject: recovered memory
right, niccola. at the time i had the hugest college girl “thing” for you. i can finally relate this, much to your amusement. it was ironic—i was an alterna-gal and then you introduced me to niccola, who was about as blonde and mainstream as they get, so i figured i was utterly not your type.

From: Robert Byrnes
To: Dawn
Subject: recovered memory
i remember everything but the “thing” for me.

From: Dawn
To: Robert Byrnes
Subject: recovered memory
how disappointing. you were supposed to tell me how dark, intriguing, and utterly alluring i was.

From: Robert Byrnes
To: Dawn
Subject: recovered memory
i did think something like that—dark, alluring, organically cool. those were hazy days for me, but the day you met niccola is vivid; you were over near the window, niccola and i were walking out the door; the two of you exchanged some unsuccessful banter about careers and connections then we left. i had the impression you were unimpressed by me.

From: Dawn
To: Robert Byrnes
Subject: recovered memory
nice of you to remember my being by the window for the introduction. i recall it being a black-cloud day. i was sure that you’d pointedly made the introduction to your goddess girlfriend, niccola, to set me straight of any ‘seducing robert’ aspirations i might have had.

From: Robert Byrnes
To: Dawn
Subject: niccola
she actually claims to be visiting here this weekend. she and tim apparel have fallen into a phone crush. niccola and I are post-sexual, but she’s arranging a fix-up with her actress friend, claire, who has requested someone who will “rock her all night long”; should i? can i?

From: Dawn
To: Robert Byrnes
Subject: niccola
do what you will and what you want!

From: Robert Byrnes
To: Dawn
Subject: the last true thing


it turns out that niccola’s actress friend (claire) is a true beauty; offspring of two princeton profs, plenty of intell. inside, concert violinist.

late getting rolling saturday … i woke for good at three after a wankie and restless day of what was properly beauty sleep; i haven’t much margin for aesthetic error, you know.

i pick them up at the airport, crank the music, roll down the windows; ’73 beetle roars, new engine.

we get here, the house; would claire like a drink? many, hold the water.

the fix is in. tim apparel is chatting with niccola; eight or so hours down the line, they’ll be screwing, and they’ll have company.

claire comes to my room to examine my cds; she finds satisfaction in van morrison, and i feign equal passion.

time for a tour of my pictures, carefully selected to show the evolution from uneasy adolescent to cocksure chap, sporting just a soupçon of dangerousness, and most recently standing on the half moon bay sands, sun striking the midriff, just so.

“do you still have that ‘six-pack?’” claire asks. i feign again: reticent, what-are-you-talking-about? embarrassment”

away we go! to san francisco; claire and i in the beetle; in another car: tim apparel, niccola, and francine lewis -- she, too, has taken a shine to tim apparel, and seems ok with sharing.

claire insists that we listen, at maximum volume, to haydn, #104, “london symphony,” running time approximately that of a hasteless car ride from palo alto to san francisco; we drink a bike bottle of icy vodka; our conversation moves like a fugue; she bites her lip as crescendos relax; when they rise, i witness extended air violin for the first time, and it is good.

at pomo, things fall apart:

niccola wigs out from some brutal stew of pills and liquor; claire and francine lewis erupt in conflict over astrology; finally, claire wigs out at niccola’s having wigged out; turns out claire is opposed to even a hint of insanity; the me and claire thing goes all to shit. claire will stay with her brother, san francisco resident, rather than step into the night with me. she has deemed me entirely resistible. i drive her to the brother’s place; we chat, kiss, stroke hair, smoke american spirits, exchange numbers, part; see ya’ … never …

tim apparel, niccola, and francine lewis all came back here, started off in the car, i’m told, before finishing on tim apparel’s bed; i stayed in the city, found paris, who is not in fact dead, to prove to myself that i could say no, and i did: had a beer at pomo, just a beer, me and paris, that was that, because i might have found a truth worth holding onto. i drove home at dawn with the replacements blaring. [and now a word from niccola, who is just emerging from tim apparel’s bedroom]

Dear Dawn:
Excuse me, but I am very much in need of a new friend. Someone dark, intriguing and utterly alluring. I have high standards for best friends & boyfriends … must be someone always making plans to be somewhere else and who moves with stealth, as if in possession of much secret knowledge. A puma.

Best,

Niccola

From: Dawn
To: Robert Byrnes
Subject: the last true thing
i’m still extracting the claws from my shoulder. i’m either disappointed that niccola is less discerning in her ability to pick up subtleties or that she’s so very protective of her darling robert. i, of course, pose no threat, being much more the wolf than the mountain lion.

From: Robert Byrnes
To: Dawn
Subject: the last true thing
you think you’re disappointed? here i am, eyes averted from the claire failure -- with only some wild urgency causing me to commit several true confessions to your sole possession, and you are merely disappointed.

From: Dawn
To: Robert Byrnes
Subject: the last true thing
you may consider me unappreciative of being the recipient of some gang-bang authored drug-induced snideness from your lost weekend.

From: Robert Byrnes
To: Dawn
Subject: the last true thing
is that to say you’re upset?

From: Dawn
To: Robert Byrnes
Subject: the last true thing
is that to say that you’re concerned?

From: Robert Byrnes
To: Dawn
Subject: the last true thing
in fact i am. and the last thing about the truth was true.

From: Dawn
To: Robert Byrnes
Subject: the last true thing
some acknowledgment of nastiness would be nicely in order. and i don’t know what that last truth thing was all about.

From: Robert Byrnes
To: Dawn
Subject: that last truth thing
around the time i first saw you, my vision was already blurred by the kinetic swirl you seem to have heard too much about; all the riotous excursions that i assumed would end or slow down, not massively accelerate, in law school. it’s the kind of motion that draws you toward people with a mad passion but also flings you into separateness.

nastiness, you say; i hear the word but can connect it to no gesture, phrase, or thought, no sleepless sentiment recorded in the most candid 4am state-of-being audit.

you saw something i can’t see.

some things, though, i do know. if you have felt hauled into a twisted stimulus-response experiment, i would have to spill out the full inventory of my thoughts and disembodied feelings to show you the contrary, because i don’t know where to go, what to say. you already know everything i know about me. you do make me try and think harder, though.

so here it is: I repress voids, irretrievable losses—like what it would have been had we worked together in boston before i left for law school. had it been you it would have been at least as grand, but differently so. unknowably different, too. that’s life’s rich pageant, again, and again, with all its sparkle, all its colors of distress, green and grey, all its clouds, love untold, imagined pasts, paths overgrown, foregone, forgotten. and you do sparkle for me, because i remember the sun shining that day you were standing near the window.

From: Dawn
To: Robert Byrnes
Subject: that last truth thing
it appeared that you had joined with niccola and focused sarcastic nastiness at my expense—whether in a drugged-out giddiness or because you had talked me up just a little too much to niccola and caused some territoriality i don’t know—but i respect the great history there, and have no aspirations or expectations to be another niccola in the book of robert’s journey. betrayal is something i am rarely able to forgive. i find people in general inherently disappointing. the diamonds among them that awake the soul in unexpected ways are rare, worth cultivating at great effort.

I sat unable to compose a reply. I had been awake for three days, all e-mails. Tim Apparel came to my door and said:
“Just downloaded a brief. Dumb it down a little and we’re all set for Moot Court. Bike ride?”

It was the only ride where Skyline failed to jolt me into fluid pleasure.
When we returned: Bababooey.

From: Dawn
To: Robert Byrnes
Subject: that last truth thing
what i mean is, you are a diamond in the canopy of stars.


From: Robert Byrnes
To: Dawn
Subject: that last truth thing
with that, you’ve given me the sweet weight that will finally hold me in sleep.

From: Dawn
To: Robert Byrnes
Subject: color me red…
and speechless… what’s the occasion? i was just minding my own business, not doing work … when suddenly, life (literally) becomes a bed of roses …

From: Robert Byrnes
To: Dawn
Subject: color me red…
do you know i had never before “sent roses”? it seemed worse than owning a rider mower or going to titty bars with the fellas from marketing.

From: Dawn
To: Robert Byrnes
Subject: !!!!
just because some cultural standards are subject to mass consumption or veer into contrivance doesn’t mean that they are, in all situations, by nature, fraudulent; put another way: things that go without saying still gain something by being said from time to time.

i thought one romantic gesture should beget another:

any free zones of time between now and summer? or black-out dates, times that would just not be a good time to visit (exams, etc.)?

life is moving pretty fast, suddenly.

(and if you’re lucky, maybe the last person in the whole world you will ever want to kiss will also be named dawn.)

To: Dawn
From: Robert Byrnes
Subject: !!!!
all free zones, except the actual hours i have to be in an actual exam, which would fall only at the end of may, last week or so; even then, half of three days; you could sleep while I take the exams. only other binding commitment is april 14th—moot court oral arguments.

we’ll drive down the coast, throw down the roof, make sharp corners, take in the sights, let the wind knot your hair.

From: Dawn
To: Robert Byrnes
Subject: so, come on, take my hand, let’s go:

american airlines
BOSTON to SAN JOSE, 10 APRIL FLT129 arr 11:47
SAN JOSE to BOSTON, 21APRIL FLT128 dep 1:00


Dawn did arrive in San Jose on April 10, 1997, a Thursday. I’d gotten pulled over for speeding that morning on my bike. I was late; the gate empty; no airplane. Flight 129 had arrived and gone. I bolted out of the terminal, and there she was, the person I hadn’t seen for two years, looking the same, better, beautiful. Then:

Last first kiss!

god

i forgot the word correspondance... correspondance... anyways, i was trying to think of another word for talks or keeping in touch, and i couldn't remember correspondance... which is odd, since I hear it every day on the west wing or so... i loooove the west wing...

damn

must find big o soundtrack

hmm

some viet girl, who must've used this computer I'm on in JC, but has a UF plaza account... weird... except that she's a cute... but I don't remember seeing any girl here ... or maybe someone else was here looking at her site... but alot of the pivtures are of st pete... this is piculiarly (fuck I can't speel) interesting... hmm... so, for you ppl, but mostly for me, I'm pasting this for my own future reference.
http://plaza.ufl.edu/trlyna/

Update: FCUK! Annie is in some of these pictures!!! where does she know all these women!!!
Update Again: Double Fuck, Annie has annoying popups on her site!!! piss!!!

Van, I bet this person is CASA, raight?! you've seen this b4 riahgT? get back to me on that!

yeas...

im brning money i dun have... also, i still havent finished my stupid revisions... I really wanted to write another edition... but maybe I'll work on that next week, or on the road up to ville... oh yeah, i may decide to ride up to school with my friend liz, since she came down to tampa for, imho, no real reason...

its funny, i have to describe her to my aunt, with the life story and everything, and she goes, "why don't you chase her?" and I reply "cause that would be like chasing a real-life sister around." its more of the shes-really-not-my-type... ishe is the true exception of women on my ladder, because I couldn't see myself with her, sober or drunk... but I'll always need the girl for that kindred island brethren support, and I'll be there for her, when I'm not moody and manly bitching around... yeah, men can be bitchy too... we call that aggression... women bitchy... we just call that bitchy. hahahah

god, george bush should be censured

for being an idiot

god, i hate mom... i need to shoot something

mom is still trying to dictate me... she is partially pushing me to be a lawyer, though i would've done it anyways, seeing as how i'm nowhere in or near new york to get any advancement in the business world unlike my alumni... but now she wants me to focus on bein an IP lawyer in China... in CHINA..!!! wtf? My chinese is one notch higher than Troi's!!! (troi is my best friend liz's bf, whos vietnamese, but learned chinese cuz he hates his ethnicity and wants to have her parents like him more)... even if i took chinese, it would have to be at that level where I would be able to translate crap on the fly, and not the children's manga, I'm talking about hardcore professional newspapers... I would literally have to be able to understand every word and nuance in a chinese news broadcast, and I don't even know half the crap they say... damn... mom is pushing me again... I just want to get to school, see what area i would like... with a partialness to IP, but if something else piqued my interest, I would like to get that on... damn you mom...

this really reminds me of rich and his father, except my parent isn't saying I'm a loser or something... darn... wish rich still read my thing... i got alot of crap to bitch about... wonder if van is still checking up on this, or forgot about here... dun matter, I still get combined hits from the blog and xlog... oh... I hit 10000 clicks... and it wasn't rich (boo) ... but still... 10 thousand, not bad.

lezbians, cool, nipple piercing, ewww..

so, if you havent read the docket on the xlog, I got to go skating! its mad long... i skated, with lesbians... god, that sounds cool... course, if you have ever seen cute/hot/pretty lesbians go at hit, its pretty hot/weird... in my view... don't get me wrong, pretty lesbians are infinitely better than ugly/fat lesbians, (observation from tw, with two fat cows talking about which girls they liked/disliked, destroying my who image of lesbians... only to be balanced by hot lesbians grinding and pumping into each other in the club...entry here, and feel free to read the old early posts during the sin summer of taiwan)... anyways... white lesbians are funky. i think my friend wanted me to grope her, quoting (I'm adjusting to get a view of the RearProj TV, she sitting on the sofa, my arm is somewhere behind her) ,"hey it looks like your hand was going to wrap around and grab my boob." @_@ (what?!) Course its prolly nothing, like her mentioning her bf recently, but then much more recently saying something about hes not really her bf, that the guy wants her to acknowledge his title for something-sake... I wasn't listening... but, of the recent activities, smoking out, stealing, going to pool halls, roller rinks, thats cuz there is nothing else to do...

Or I am eing dense again...I DO know that emily is crushing on me, often. (shes this girl that used to go to UF but was dragged back to junior college, and she had a disorder where the hypothalamus didn't function so she didn't get a "grow spurt" per-se... (how the hell do you use "per se") So she always wants me to go somewhere with her: go with her to attend something for school credit, go to the mall, take her to the movie... Most of the time I hide and become very curt on the phone so i can make her mad and hang up... cuz thats how I deal with women... I'd rather they hate me than miss me... so i'll do ass-like actions... not pick up fone, say I'll meet them somewhere and show up on asian time, etc... its my way of dealing with ppl when I don't feel like doing something.

anyways, I was supposed to say something about the old girls, but I'll put that off till next week

body piercings, my new phobia...

yeah, so guess what, I figured out something that makes me cringe when i think of it, and i can't stand an observation. and, its body piercings... yup, you heard me, sticking holes in your body for the sake of dangling metal doodads for fashion. I restrict my new deterrment to anything that isn't a ear, lip, nose, or tongue piercing, and maybe bellies... this is cuz i've seen them, and those aren't bad, or maybe because those are in areas i think I'm tolerant of it... actually, i was very against nose ones when my munchkin Jessie decided to do that, and i said "if you do, i won't like it," and I saw it later on, and it was small and quaint, like irulan on RW.

no, my tiff is those other piercings, mainly those piercings in the naughty regions, like your penis, or nipple, or hood (you know where), or god forbid, your asshole... (god, i hope that doesn't exist)... the whole deal is that I feel those areas really don't need any of that crap tacked on... seriously... nipple ring, whats it gonna be for? the only way ur gonna see it or any of thse areas, is if the area itself was exposed... the whole deal is that your supposed to see these trinkets... what do you think it would feel like if a woman saw a metal ring on a man's winkie while going down on him, only to have th ring stuck on her uvulva or filling... same question for guys... reversed and with a hood ring... yeah... its gonna hurt someone alright...

The age of tattoos has spawn a generation of people being live expressions represented in body art... before, tattoos were sailors and prison inmates... on biceps, shoulders, or necks... nowadays, its spread to shoulder blades for men and lower backs for women... (IMHO: tattooing a bf's initials on you is the stupidest idea in the world, short of you giving birth to a child). I'm still a "natural beauty" person... I feel like makeup makes ppl uber fake... except fr nice lip gloss, i would ban every other cosmetic product and shoot into the sun any person who majored in cosmetology... tattoos are permenant decorations that, if tasteful, are tolerant for me, otherwise, hellz no...

back to piercings... I'm never hooking up with a chick who has piercings in my "naw-ah" areas... I'm still baffled why ppl want to pierce their glans/hood... i mean, you have to take another minute, ladies, to feel down there and jab another metal ring in an area you really can't see... what if you draw blood...

In the future, for my Op-eds... I hope to back up my bitching with some anecdotes, to make it look like I researched some good shit to cite... good thing my next post will center back around the women of... sorry, jon called me yesteryear, and how i pin the reason I'm attracted to certain types of girls... which must be b/c of past facial resemblence or somethin... i dunno.

business opportunity

Well, i found the flash drive... i'm sooo stupid... whew..

anyways... i was surfing around, not looking for porn because I have dial-up, and I keep thinking about whether to get netflix like my exroomate matt did, or my cousin edna does... and then it hit me... why isnt there an adult netflix... not like netflix with a porn division, but a porn only netflix, and you call it pornflix... I can some of you are not touching your mouse and keyboard, but think about it... after reading the true porn clerk stories (which you should have, LAST Year), you know that there are alot of people that want nothing more than to only rent XXX, not buy it... because, unless its a movie you really want for your collection, you just want to experience it once... so I'm thinking, Is there some parallel netflix that deals only in porn? hmm... a man can think about the most absurd entrepeneurial things at 4:50am.

god, I'm so stupid

I've lost the most important thing to me right now... my fucking flash drive... its a little plastic thing thats replaced my need for floppies and zips... and it has all my law school papers i was working on... and i fucking lost it... i dont know if i left it in a computer at school or its in the car, but for right now, i'm fuckiing pissed... cuz now i gotta retweak the damn paper again, and i dont think i made extra copys of the final draft... PLUS I gotta write another addenda to my probation papers, and redo my resume.... this blows... i how whoever took the damn thing and didnt turn it in rots in his car as he gets sliced in half by a mack truck.

in the meantime... i have decided that relationships are too much bullshit... this is what it feels like now: women who like you, but you dont like, women you like who don't like you... i have seen certain types of relationships of women who like you who you like, but that is from an observation standpoint... and there is no such thing as women you want to punch in the face who want to scratch your eyes out... but that would be funny.

I have not gotten a call from MTV, sadly cuz they think a gay guy is mucccch better than an azn guy for the series... comn, they have had every single other type of person, this is bullshit... gay guy, gay girl, black guy/girl, southern m/f, northern m/f, hispanic m/f (I'm guessing here), drunk guy girl, asian girl... but no asian guy... its cuz an asian guy wont be cute enough to fit the demograph appeal of the idiot mtv generation, although mtv put a big risk in funding Better luck Tomorrow, which still would kick the shit outta stupid movies like "The perfect score" which should be really be called "the fag of a movie". i dunno... mad... stupid Lexar... need to find it... please hope its in the car...

OH, if ANYONE KNOWS HOW TO FIX PS2s LET ME KNOW!!!!!

i hate you all

tas ppl suck, you all suxors... why...? cuz none of you fuckers tell me whats going on...!!!!
i could be mellow and apathetic like sandy, since she cut herself off from themwhen we all parted in thailand, but I'm piiiisssed... is there some TAS memo that goes around where ppl say "hey, lets go back this year"? why da fuck dont i know about it!? I'll tell you why. cuz i'm down in the wang of america! no one is here... everyone else is in SF or NY or Bost.... florida blows, fyi... the only good thing is IOA... and beaches, and the bikini clad women in december, besides that... everything blows... the only reason ppl should come to florida is to seee mee!!! me, come fuckin find me you whores!!!

anyways... pissed, and the fact rich still has my stuff mashimaro still pisses me off... cuz i want my beer bunny back!!!