First off, I loooooove xangalock... keeps all you ghost stalkers in check... whooohoo...
I bet if I photoshop this, I can get them to not blink at the same time.
WARNING, THIS THING IS SOOOO LONG IT WILL TAKE YOU A DAY TO READ THIS! Be WArned.OK, The big day! I don't remember who woke up first... But I bet I woke up early. Truthfully, I had my LBB in my hand when I woke up, because I was deep in thought about the speech. Of course, I was also apprehensive about this crazy thing Vicki's sister wanted me to do... Something about the John Travolta jig from Saturday Night Fever... YEAAAAHHH right... Good thing the brideside were already in flushing somewhere getting their hair and makeup done, so I just text Vicki sayin "No way am I doing that jig." That started off a concession debate to do the fox trot instead... omg... they want to kill me... by dance. So I looked up "How to Foxtrot in 20 minutes.... for Dummies," and now I know all there is to know about the foxtrot... for intermediate bronze. Meanwhile, like the day before, the house was coming back to life as everyone woke up. Jim was back to looking at his pristine Excel sheet about all the items to-do. Also, I was privy to the cool ceramic-like fortune cookies that would be used as place settings, and the menu... mmmm 12-course meal... I'm gonna have everything.
We're supposed to get to the church by 11am, or leave by 11am... I don't remember, but I do remember getting suited up for the drive. Back into my funky monky suit. Man, I am soo sexy; I would do me... I'm dammmn sexy ^^. hahaha. Got some pictures of the prepping, because the best pictures are ones you aren't aware of..
I'm leaving for Geo's place after the wedding, so I got all my stuff placed into Jim's Family car. Then... finally, its off to destiny... but first, drop the car off at the Honeymoon Hotel... at Foxhollow. Small snag on the way there... Jim lost the number for the Foxhollow Hotel place, but thankfully, my uber phone found the number (note, use 46645 for all your phone needs), and J was all go for the vehicle drop-off.
We hopped into the Dad's car, and high-tailed it to Chinatown, stopping off enroute to get jugs and jugs of coffee, and donuts... I had no idea you can get coffee in a box... first it was wine, then coffee, soo it will be beer... thank the gods...
Got to the church... Moved the DunkinDonut things up to the reception room. Then began this marathon of going to the Sanctuary to the reception room via a series of flight of stairs up and down... *ugh*. Did some prepping at the reception room, getting some refreshments to the fridge... yada yada... boring... some relatives or church friend's of vick's came up to help... or sit down... I don't remember, I do remember one looked like my Aunt JoMa. except my age. Man, whats taking soo long.
Friends and family were piling into the sanctuary now.
Jeremiah
Grandmas
Pastors and reverends.
Jim greeting everyone.
Hot bridesmaids @_o
My proudest CC moment: Jim sweatin to the weddies... Someone get him A/C!
My future savior (i'll tell you later)
Groomsman James
Ray and Me... Not fat-looking yet...
FLower girl, I want to wrap her up and take her back to tampa.
Ok, soo.. anyways, its getting to Zero Hour... We know the plan... Here's how it went down.
1) The mom's or grandmas came down the aisle and lit some unity candles..2) As the Obasan's came back down the aisle, James and Ray followed behind pulling the wedding runner that said "And they lived happily ever after"3) Me and Jim walk the right side of the aisle, following the pastor to the altar.4) Choir music was supposed to play here, but it was lacking.5) The groomsmen escorted the grandmas and seated them down and made their way up to the altar... the Bridesmaids followed suit.
6) The Ring boy and flower girl were supposed to come down the aisle, but they stopped midway and did the cute toddler things... everyone laughed. I remember seeing Vicki and Father behind the double doors, and Vicki was belly-aching from the riot.7) Finally, the Bride and father started walking down the aisle to the pomp music, but they came a tad to fast, to which the dad mouthed "oops."
8) Jimmy received the bride from the father. Everyone prays9) The Pastor says some thing, then the brothers of the two families came up to the podium to deliver scriptures to the audience, but they spoke too fast, and in low towns, so I wonder if anyone heard. Then the Older Reverend delivered the meaning of the scriptures and whatnot.10) The Pastor does some more words.The bridesmaids were half looking at the floor half looking up at the altar. Meanwhile, the groomsmen were trying to keep their hands in a uniform position... clasp in front or back... hmm... 11) The vows are given..12) The pastor asks for the ring, and my turn to shine... I bring out the box and hand-deliver the rings to the Pastor. They did vows and gave rings.13) everyone prays
14) Reverend presents the newlyweds to the audience... Jim kisses Vicki prematurely... Then the reverend says "you may kiss the bride" and everyone laughs... and Jim and Vicki blush.
15) The couple leave down the aisle, followed by arm-locked bridal party.Omg its finally done. Jim and Vicki are complete. Everyone makes their way outside to do the rice throwing thing, but we replaced rice with bubbles.
I guess I forgot to mention that before the wedding we were waiting forever for the Photographers to show up and were going to use my uber phone to find them again but they showed up finally... And I think the lead photo guy made me the contact man for things.
So, now its time to head over to Grand Central Station to get bridal shots with the first string. The photo got my number in case there was a delay or problem (which leads to the future idea that I paid the photo guy to get closer to Liz =P) On the way over to Midtown via FDR, everyone inside started gnoshing on the ginormous platter of Maki Sushi rolls.... soooo good... ohh, and the limo was good and loonnnng... cool
After waiting for a bit at the terminal, the photo guys came and we did an hour long shoot at the station, punctuated by random compliments of "congratulations". Amid the shoot, a little rugrat came up and hugged all the females. creepy.
I still don't understand why I got the special treatment of "get closer to her" "closer!" except I have an idea, but it probably is crazytastic.
Afterward, we did some more driving, popped some champagne and headed to Flushing for the banquet.
Man, we finally made it to the banquet, held at this huge restaruant, a 2-story palace of food.... mmm... food... the banquest was on the Upper level, and preparations were underway to get it all setup... I guess we got a little early. So everyone started to get to their own duties, or just started doing any job, including setting up the Kara-OK in the greenroom. The MC came in and gave a itineray rundown of the scene and stuff.. Then we hit a little snap.
"wheres the photobox?"
"The waht?"
Then Vicki, already in a semi stressful and euphoric state, mentally ripped me a new one. I would gladly have driven back to babylon to get it, but I have no idea where anything is, and let's not get anyone killed on the expressway. Course, I just put a little distance from her and closer to the public, so there can be witnesses if I mysteriously die. Guests started to trickle in also, so James and Elaine manned the signup table... and Soso was standing under the dome thing. I showed Soso science with the dome's sound-bouncing coolness.. neat eh?
Guests were supposed to find their namecard on the fortune cookie and match it with the table... which wasn't bad... In the obscure part of the hall, ppl were playing mah-jong.
When enough people arrived, waiters with random food came around, and I jumped a couple of guys for the goodies... while the couple began wedding shots with guests.
Then the photo guys took a break and it came to everyone's attention that the Tea Ceremony was not done yet. I have no idea what that is, but apparently its big, and Vicki was going into shades of purple, added to the tightness of the dress... Finally, they got back and the Ceremony of Tea began, w/o me knowing I was supposed to be there to help... I was hiding myself near the bar getting juiced up, when the bride's mom calls me up to get to Jim's side to clasp his necklaces, all 2 of them, while Vicki got the rest of the jewelry. I felt envious of the girls pouring tea and stuff, at least they got something to do. I thought I was going to mop jim's brow, but nooo, he didn't want that... Some bodyman.
man, he looks bored, tired or sad... maybe i should tighten this necklace on pimpdaddy shek.
Well, finally, after what seemed like an hour, but really was 60 minutes... we got that tea done, and it was time to introduce the bridal party to the guests, a la grande entrez. Game plan is to have the couples walk out to the front of the hall, and do a twirly and then grasp hands in an arch... creativity galore... meanwhile I'm telling Lizzie about all my skillz I developed from the 20 minute videos of "Dancing with the Stars" and some foxtrot champion 12yr-old. ... yeah, I'm alll ready for that train wreck... But, to at least pay homage to the 70's, we went out to the hall in style. After James Ray Michael (Jim's brother), Elaine, Soso, and Lisa did their own funky entrance... Me and Liz headed out into the crowd like royalty: she with the Princess Di handwave, and me with the over-the-top Celeb wave-and-kiss... then, we passed under the bridal party arches, I twirled Liz (which was borne from the couple practice turns in the hallway), and then we arch-posed like disco celebs... Yeah, I want to steal some limelight
. Then finally, the newlyweds came out into the fray, and the crescendo-ing music and the crowd went wild.
The couple (JV for short), came onto the dance floor, and the MC told Jim that Vick had a surprise for him, and everyone gazed their attention to the screen, where a photo anthology of the two began playing. Jim was awestruck, and Vicki was beaming, as the two's lives were documented through time, up until the photos of separate beings blended into single pictures of the two together, ending with an hour-old picture of the two that I had taken and given to liz to finalize the slideshow. After the end, the MC asked if Jim was surprised, to which he nodded, and MC told Jim that Vick should deserve something, and Jim gave her a big wet one. And then I realized something... I hardly had ever seen Jim express this much affection with Vicki ever. ever... This boy was truly in love with her... and it would take an event such as this occasion for me to see that affection stand through.
Ok, so now its the newlywed dance, and JV get things started. I was secretly stabbing myself in the brain, trying to give myself an anneurysm, so that I could save myself from this foxtrot fiasco, but I failed that. Then the MC asked for the rest of the bridal party to join in, and I looked at Liz in the "oh hellz no tell me we don't have to do this," kind of way. Thankfully, God does love me, because the dance music was incompatible with foxtrot. Whew. So, its just normal dancing eh? I took Lizzie's hand with my left, put my right on her side, and we just glided on the floor (to my perspective... at least we didn't mow people down). JV were a few steps away and I could see them whispering sweet nothings to each other. You can see them a little relieved so far. I mentioned something to Jim on the floor, but I can't remember what it was. Oh well.. Thank god, the dance lasted a bit, and we were done, left to our seats at teh head table.
FINALLY... FOOD... (oh wait, I ate already... who cares!!! bring me food!) the beginnings of the 12 course meal manifested onto the table, I can't describe whatever foods came out because it was so many, but I will say that every bite I took was heaven... I mean, I died a billion times at that table. The steak thingy... the soup... the chicken... the uh... I can't remember the rest... and for the sole reason of me being so intertwined with the eremonies that I didn't get any food toward the end
.
Anyways, during the feast of a thousand bliss, the revelers at the lower levels banged their glasses for a speech or something... I think to provoke some action... the MC made it a game all of a sudden... a kissing game... because Jim's lip skills were lax according to the MC, so JV pulled two couples out of crowd, including David Sahib (missed that boy) and his longtime woman (uh, emily... or hailey, I think?... sidebar: I forgot Sahib had a smoking fine wife-to-be, who is pretty smart too... we talked about her work over near Union Square, where she was some Market Analyst, my dream job I wanted in ny; ya know I never did talk to his girlfriend b4, even bak in the day... David chose good).
Anyways, the two couples were to make out as outlandish as possible, and JV would choose who to mimic... Needless to say, Sahib won with his exotic move which included bending his girl down in a toohotfor-tv moment. So, Jim and Vick tried to mimic it, and next thing you know, Jim's hands ran from an embrace to south of the border into a full-on moongrab. The crowd went wild. I think the head table was cheering. JV blushed, and the MC warned that if any more clanking occured, they ould be subject to a game too.
Food, food, bar, food, bar... Oh yeah, we had punctuated the food and hall with sporatic RIT toasts at the bar, with lines of shots all set up... compliments of this freaky uncle who was a real hoot.. I believe he was brideside. He loved being in a drinking segment.
So finally, it has came down to that time of the itinerary I loathed, the Cake-cutting, because my speech was next.
Ohkay, I was still edgy about this speech, even after comparing notes with the maid of honor, where I realized Liz's was very fairytale, and mine was child's play.
If you want to see my speech, go back a few posts. I will say this: Ithought I was ontrolling the room, but I think I got carried away at the end, since it WAS Rocky's theme song playing in the background. D'Oh. Oh, what I wrote and what I said, became very dissimilar, punctuated with shouts at Ray and co. I remember the end. "everyone, if you will stop eating for ten seconds and lift your glasses to the bride and groom" (ray)"You don't have a glass" (me)"Oh, I need a glass... oh, ok, this (heineken) beer bottle. Everyone raise your glasses to the bride and groom (music crescendos) to a happy night, many happy days, PEACE AND LONG LIFE!." something like that. People clap, jim tries to give me a hug as I almost hand off my beer to the MC; gave the MICROPHONE back, held the beer, gave Jim a hug, said "I love ya man, its all for you."
Liz's speech was cute... she brought a book. people laughed. I went bak to the food.. dam i missed some entree.
It has came to my attention around this time that I'm red, probably from the Glow, so I had started to drink nonalcoholic fluids to clear me up; next thing I know, I'm told to take every drink that is handed to Jim at these table toasts. OMG, Table what?! Fortunatly, Liz got thrown into this thing too, so we kept to the back of the party, only getting in sporatic toasts some of the time, and toasting ourselves half the time. (I think I said "don't leave me, I don't know what we're doing here" to her, because, yeah I had no clue) all I know is we traversed each and every single table in the hall, and that was about 60 tables... each lasting 50 seconds... Ok, running around that got me a little cleared up, and me and liz agreed our speeches weren't A+ material.
JV did the garter/bouquet thing.
I don't know whats happening here. I was somewhere else, wandering prolly, I know I put someone as a shield in front of me so I didn't get the garter... ahahhaha.
Vicki hanged into a hinese dress too. That way she could breathe.
The rest of the night became blurrier I think, but I'll sum up most the events... there was more dancing, and the dancing turned into a rave... the older people left, while the young ones went insane.
Me and Liz, the most important now, accompanied Jim to get our John Handcocks onto the marriage application and Catholic permission slip. then more dancing. The photo guy came again to do a wedding message to the couple... me and liz did ours together, to be uber cooler than the rrest. Then, we pretended we were sleeping during the cleanup to get out of work... ha!
Jon and I, utterly exhausted. By the end of the night, we were holding each other up.
And then we pretended we were sleeping--to the dismay of the newlyweds. We mutually agreed that he was the worst Best Man, and I was the worst Maid of Honor... ever.That was quoted from Liz.
By this time I realized I had no way of contacting GEO about where he lived, becasue my cell died from the proactive use of the camera phone... I was freaking out... How am I going to get to Tump place... I know tits near the water, but I don't know where... thankfully, Lisa, the bridesmaid, my savior, mentioned that she had a place in Union Square that I could crash at, so I was like, THANK YOU. So began our after party where 6 people would fit into Fugi's car. But, before that, I hanged back into street clothes, said goodbye to Jim and Vick, thanked Jim's parents for putting up with me, said goodbye to the rest of the brideside party, and me and ray and James and chris (lisa's date?) and lisa piled into the car.
The funny part was that with the amount of people in the car, Lisa had to lie across three men's laps the whole trip back to the city. That , coupled with bad driving and bad navigation, made Mr. Toad's wild ride seem like a ferris wheel.
We got back to her place, Irving Place, everyone rested for a bit, then bar hopping to the nth degree, and some dancing (i did none)
did I mention drinking? Oh, we made chris, the white kid, learn to play drinking games, since he loves mandarin languages.
Finally, the post post party wound up, so I said goodbye to the guys, and me and Lisa headed back to the Irving Place, and watched this off-comedy BBC series that was comical in a british sorts. I passed out half way through and woke up toward the end. Lisa passed out toward the end. That's pretty much the end of this night. I was too bloated from bar hopping to think anything, except, this was a great day to get married. -To be continued-
Flickr source:all my flicker pictures... PS, no flcl happened during this day. i swear.
